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Old 01-23-2003, 07:54 PM   #21
jamz
Scooby Guru
 
Member#: 8725
Join Date: Jul 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Portland MAINE
Vehicle:
2013 Black Company
Annalist

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Dear ass-tards:

I own you all in my huge SUV. Your puny mortal vehicles are naught but speedbumps in my path, and small ones at that. Stay out of my way in parking lots, interstates, side roads and driveways, and we will get along fine.

My truck is superior in size, weight, momentum, static and dynamic energy, and smog production. I can do what I want. I have to step *down* from my cab just to get down to your level, you diminutive, nasal, whining little irritants.

I drive an SUV. I am HUGE. I am IRONMAN. I have SPEED DIAL. I can put on MASCARA, EAT a FAST FOOD BURGER, and TALK TO my BROKER or DAUGHTER'S SOCCER COACH. I have everything, and embody everything that's great about consumerism.


Regards,

45% of the driving public.





who can tell I'm driving a rental Ford Explorer SUV for the first time?
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