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Old 01-23-2013, 11:01 AM   #613
Crazy_pilot
Scooby Newbie
 
Member#: 164242
Join Date: Nov 2007
Chapter/Region: E. Canada
Location: Toronto
Vehicle:
1992 SVX
2008 Spec B

Default

99 Ford Taurus wagon. Hand me down car from my parents that I beat the snot out of for a good 4 years until I passed it on to my brother. We junked it when the body started to split in half. Problems with the car:

-Radio stopped working. Used a walkman CD player and computer speakers for music.
-Windows could only be controlled by driver's door. Window lock button probably stuck internally.
-Rear seatbelts jammed in fully retracted position.
-Rear door handles would stick open and the doors would not latch. Combine this with the above seatbelt issue and you get people nearly flying out of the car around corners on a few occasions.
-Parking brake would seize on if used. Disconnected cable to prevent this occuring.
-Put new labels on climate control heat knob saying "cold" and "less cold". Windshield defrost/defog was almost completely useless.
-Trunk struts were only strong enough to hold the tailgate open for an indeterminate short amount of time. After this they would suddenly fail with no warning. Tailgate weighed at least 70 lbs and despite the rust felt very solid when it landed on your back.
-Floor had circles painted to show "safe zones" for feet. Excessive pressure in non-safe zones would result in Fred Flintstone driving.
-Fuel tank started leaking around the weld if filled more than half way. I actually fixed this one.

Despite all this the old beast never once let me down. It would start flawlessly on -45 mornings in January without a block heater and was somehow able to haul itself through any amount of snow even without proper tires. It never really had any maintenance work (oil changes were sort of an annual thing. Maybe.). Never failed an emissions test. Survived my brother sending it into a 7 foot deep ditch, minus a tire. I do miss the old wagon on occasion. Had more sex in the back of that thing than in my bed when I was 17.
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