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Old 09-21-2011, 02:23 PM   #1
Damaca
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Default Douchebag Drivers of Hampton Roads

This thread was inspired by Dear MAIC drivers but it features the special brand of psychotic, law defying, stupidity ladden driving techniques employed by the typical Hampton Roads' driver.

Share your stories whether they are about crap drivers, accidents, traffic for NO REASON, parking nightmares, etc. Pictures and heck, video, are even great.








For non-locals: If you're unfamiliar with this area, we have the largest concentration of military bases and facilities in the world all squished into a seaside metropolitan area of about 1.7 million people in 8 cities. These cities are connected by a poorly designed and so-so maintained, aging road surface connected by 4 tunnels and a numerous amount of draw bridges. Our roads are heavily patrolled (mostly around blind curves) by local and state police. And to top it off, it's totally legal in this state to drive while talking on your cell phone.

In short, driving here is a freaking nightmare.







Disclaimer: I am in no way shape or form dismissing myself as not being part of the ongoing problem. Just a lot of us have some humourous stories and we think it's time they get a home of their own.
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Old 09-21-2011, 02:28 PM   #2
Damaca
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To the out of reg mustache having buttface in the red F150 with a matching bed cap which was ladden with stickers on 564 yesterday. You decided that intentionally slamming on your brakes in front of me after cutting me off to get into the HOV lane, which you had more than ample time to get into BEFORE I began approaching, My brakes are better than yours. Guess that really pissed you off. Guess my smirk added to it. I hope the cop pulled you over in the HOV for not having a passanger you douche. Oh and I hope you got a flat and ran out of gas.
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Old 09-21-2011, 02:38 PM   #3
DavC825
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Guess you've never driven on MD's 495...
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Old 09-21-2011, 02:42 PM   #4
Damaca
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I have. It's not a bowl of peaches either but I'd take Anything between DC and Philly over here.
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Old 09-21-2011, 02:45 PM   #5
DavC825
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Getting cut off, tail gated, flicked off, old People stopped on merge lanes, folks doing 20mph under posted speedlimit....happens daily.
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Old 09-21-2011, 03:01 PM   #6
Damaca
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That's just typical east coast driving. Hell in New Jersey, I think the middle finger is a greating.
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Old 09-21-2011, 03:14 PM   #7
saint_foo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Damaca View Post
I have. It's not a bowl of peaches either but I'd take Anything between DC and Philly over here.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Really?!! Take your pick:

The mixing bowl, 270N/S during rush hour, 66, Route 50 (both MD and VA)....

I was just in Va Beach and felt relaxed in your traffic. There are a bunch of asshat drivers, I'll give you that, but spend a month in what we deal with.
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Old 09-21-2011, 03:18 PM   #8
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People have a tendency to "NOT" see me next to them and decide to turn on their signal, or not, and change into my lane while I'm right next to them starring at them. Black car, big wing, semi-loud exhaust, green or gold wheels... Am I that hard to miss? Happens about once a month here in the PHR, not so much on the other side of the water.
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Old 09-21-2011, 03:22 PM   #9
scoobysnax86
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Ha! Subscribed.
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Old 09-21-2011, 03:29 PM   #10
Borjaq
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saint_foo View Post
I was just in Va Beach and felt relaxed in your traffic. There are a bunch of asshat drivers, I'll give you that, but spend a month in what we deal with.
Agree. I'm from NOVA, but haven't lived up there for about 13 years now. It was somewhat bad then and now ... it's just a parking lot durring rush hour or if there is an accident. 495 near Springfeild is like a warzone now with all the construction.

It gets a little bad down here, enough to piss you off, but the most I ever wait is about 30-45 mins, depending on whatever happened in the tunnel. As for the NOB roads, I have no clue...
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Old 09-21-2011, 04:21 PM   #11
Damaca
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I've been driving for 18 years and lived in 7 states and 3 countries and I will say that NoVA's roads are a nightmare but you're people seem to still follow logic. The drivers down here in the "country" seem to have a near epidemic disregard for any safety, be it their own or the other drivers around them. I'd take driving in Italy over this place and I lived there for 4 years.

NoVA peeps, you can keep the 95 parking lot from about Dumfries and north. But your traffic and the traffic in Baltimore makes sense to me for some reason. Maybe it's because I'm from 20 minutes outside of Philly and traffic in a major city with a massive metropolitan population along a major corridor make sense even if it is frustrating. :shrug:

Last edited by Damaca; 09-21-2011 at 04:29 PM. Reason: Over usage of commas is bad mmkay
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Old 09-21-2011, 04:24 PM   #12
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Someone tries to merge into the side of my car about once a month, usually in VA beach. If it's between 4 and 6, I can't even think about leaving Norfolk, from my house to any interstate is a 45 minute drive in itself. And then, the interstates aren't even moving.
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Old 09-21-2011, 04:24 PM   #13
Damaca
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Borjaq View Post
People have a tendency to "NOT" see me next to them and decide to turn on their signal, or not, and change into my lane while I'm right next to them starring at them. Black car, big wing, semi-loud exhaust, green or gold wheels... Am I that hard to miss? Happens about once a month here in the PHR, not so much on the other side of the water.
It's a black car thing. lol. I had a woman in a gold MoronO "not" see me yesterday at that stupid merge from Independence onto 264. You know the one, like when you're leaving Freedom Wash to head back to PHR? She might have been blind but her hearing worked great. She got a ear full of Hella and promptly noticed the black car that was not only next to her but a little ahead then almost smacked into the barriers. :facepalm: The tunnel vision people employ here is mind boggling. lol.
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Old 09-21-2011, 04:28 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tizbitz View Post
Someone tries to merge into the side of my car about once a month, usually in VA beach. If it's between 4 and 6, I can't even think about leaving Norfolk, from my house to any interstate is a 45 minute drive in itself. And then, the interstates aren't even moving.
Ya gotta learn the back roads. Well, the handful that there are. They aren't that much better but the odds of an accident are much lower. Some dude in a Camry decided to brake check a car behind him for riding his ass in the HOV lane on the way home today. This was at 330 pm when it was open and NOB was trying to empty out early. He just up and slammed on his brakes in the 64 HOV and I caught it on video. I wish I had the reverse camera on so you could see the pile up that almost happened behind me. The two lanes became 4 and I had the nerve to thank god that I didn't get hit. I need another camera.
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Old 09-21-2011, 04:50 PM   #15
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Our speed limits are a major cause for the congestion in my opinion... every time I drive out of town and pass Jefferson Ave I think about it... Why is it when 5 lanes at 55mph condense down to just 2 lanes the speed limit raises to 70 mph? Even more so coming back in to town... 2 lanes at 70mph opens up to 5 lanes and the speed limit goes down? W.T.F? Then there are the people.. how did the a-hole in front of me in the "fast lane" doing 65mph in a 70 mph zone get his/her drivers license if they can't read, the sign we both passed clearly said "slower traffic KEEP RIGHT" arrrgggghhhhhhhh I'm pretty sure to get to hell you have to drive through an exact replica of the HRBT aka Satin's Sphincter at 10 mph next to a 60yr old man in a miata blaring 106.9 the fox and then not turning down the radio when it goes to static.
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Old 09-21-2011, 04:55 PM   #16
mav1c
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Thing is, it's not just HR, or NoVA, or any other particular area. The WHOLE country sucks at driving because it's so damn easy to get a license. Everyone thinks its a right, not a privilege. Given, there are some exceptional retards and d-bags out there, but I would bet they're a retard and/or d-bag no matter what they're doing.
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Old 09-21-2011, 05:01 PM   #17
j4k3
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I drive for 8 hours a day in a company billboard which keeps me from yelling, giving the finger, brake checking, and just generally putting someone into the wall. I know all about the ****ing morons in this area.
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Old 09-21-2011, 05:19 PM   #18
SubieChik
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lol at people thinking our traffic is relaxed. I have driven in NOVA, DC, Maryland, Philly.....yes traffic is worse, but I would expect that with a major metropolitan area. We aren't in a major city but yet we have the traffic of a major city.

Dumbasses are everywhere, but I will point out that since I have been driving (12yrs) I have been in 5 accidents....all were not my fault, and 4 of them were here in the HR. I have only been here 4 years. The first one was a moose in Alaska back in 2005.....lol


And Kevin you have got to be kidding me? You have never waited in traffic here for more than 45 minutes? Wow....I was stuck in traffic getting on 164 today for 40 minutes coming home from the Naval Hospital....I got to bypass the rest of the traffic, the tunnel line was still about a mile or so long after I got out of it.

Last edited by SubieChik; 09-21-2011 at 05:31 PM.
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Old 09-21-2011, 07:59 PM   #19
Borjaq
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Thats because after 30-45 mins I get off the road, lol. Highway parking lots are the lame!
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Old 09-21-2011, 08:05 PM   #20
ImNOrobo
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What I have been saying for this area is the Military is at fault. Since it is a highly military congested area we have all the retards stationed out here. I see pretty bad drivers on the highways and pretty much everyone has a red or blue base sticker, even the green civilian sticker. On base they think some rules don't apply at all also. Pisses me off.

Phoenix and L.A. traffic is pretty bad from personal experiance, obviously L.A. is pretty famous for bad traffic. Both locations are big metropoltain areas, I would rather drive in those places than here. I can't wait to get back home and drive some mountain twisties everyday and deal with no traffic and hidden cops
.

[END RANT]
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Old 09-21-2011, 08:12 PM   #21
ammodawg79
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I have fit in well here. I am now a douchebag driver.

Sometimes if I see someone trying to cut over into an exit lane while it is a solid/double solid line, I will speed up to keep them out. Just because a blinker is on, doesn't mean you automatically are allowed over. 9 times out of 10 there is little to no traffic behind me. Get in line like everyone else or you have a choice, hit me or miss your exit.

If you ride the left lane and are going slower than ANYONE, you will be cut off and if that causes you to lose it and run off the road, so be it. Time for people to understand that the left lane on any road is for PASSING at a reasonable speed (passing at 1mph is not reasonable, step on the gas and then GTFO of the way).

State troopers can blow me. I think it is funny how the speed limit in VA is often 60+ on every road OUTSIDE of HR, leading me to think that they don't raise it because it nets a profit. People will cruise at 70 no matter what, so the only reason to NOT raise the limit is because +15 nets more money than +5. Hell, +5 wouldn't even warrant a ticket.

News flash morons, when it isn't HOV hours, the far left lane is not the HOV lane anymore. MOVE! Watch your clock and rear view. It is 0801? GTFO of the left ASAP.

When someone DOES allow you in, give the normal "wave" of thanks. Don't and I will probably call you an ******* and might cut you out for being a dick.

The worst part? I am being stationed in DC after this. FUUUUUUUU.......
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Old 09-21-2011, 08:33 PM   #22
Damaca
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mav1c View Post
Thing is, it's not just HR, or NoVA, or any other particular area. The WHOLE country sucks at driving because it's so damn easy to get a license. Everyone thinks its a right, not a privilege. Given, there are some exceptional retards and d-bags out there, but I would bet they're a retard and/or d-bag no matter what they're doing.
That is the truth. I grew up in Jersey, and have lived in Memphis, San Diego, Chicago, Bahrain (traffic laws?), Italy (traffic signs are suggestions), North East PA, Kuwait, Laredo( TX), and Virginia Beach. I've driven cross country too many times and even across Europe. Americans can not drive. But VA Beach makes LA, DC, NYC, Bmore, PA and Chicago all make sense. Although I have to admit, living here does make me fear NY plates. WTF are they on? They make Jersey drivers look sane.

Quote:
Originally Posted by j4k3 View Post
I drive for 8 hours a day in a company billboard which keeps me from yelling, giving the finger, brake checking, and just generally putting someone into the wall. I know all about the ****ing morons in this area.
You, sir, are my hero. I don't know how you do it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ammodawg79 View Post
I have fit in well here. I am now a douchebag driver.

Sometimes if I see someone trying to cut over into an exit lane while it is a solid/double solid line, I will speed up to keep them out. Just because a blinker is on, doesn't mean you automatically are allowed over. 9 times out of 10 there is little to no traffic behind me. Get in line like everyone else or you have a choice, hit me or miss your exit.

If you ride the left lane and are going slower than ANYONE, you will be cut off and if that causes you to lose it and run off the road, so be it. Time for people to understand that the left lane on any road is for PASSING at a reasonable speed (passing at 1mph is not reasonable, step on the gas and then GTFO of the way).

State troopers can blow me. I think it is funny how the speed limit in VA is often 60+ on every road OUTSIDE of HR, leading me to think that they don't raise it because it nets a profit. People will cruise at 70 no matter what, so the only reason to NOT raise the limit is because +15 nets more money than +5. Hell, +5 wouldn't even warrant a ticket.

News flash morons, when it isn't HOV hours, the far left lane is not the HOV lane anymore. MOVE! Watch your clock and rear view. It is 0801? GTFO of the left ASAP.

When someone DOES allow you in, give the normal "wave" of thanks. Don't and I will probably call you an ******* and might cut you out for being a dick.

The worst part? I am being stationed in DC after this. FUUUUUUUU.......
It's funny, we do say thanks up in the Delaware Valley. These douchenozzle's can't be bothered. I DON'T OWE YOU S**T, *******, you're welcome. But seriously, people around here don't even know how to say thank you when someone holds the door open for them. I'm very vocal about that. I will call you out if you don't say thank you and if you're still an ass, I'll make you feel like ****. I only do it here because only here have I come to hate humanity so much.

I'm looking for jobs between DC and Philly. Lord only knows what's in store for me up there.

Philly FTW.
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Old 09-21-2011, 09:29 PM   #23
ammodawg79
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Philly drivers are worse but not on purpose like the folks here, they are just dumb. Too close to NJ. The people are a little nicer though, as long as you aren't a Cowboy fan, lol.
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Old 09-21-2011, 09:59 PM   #24
Butt Dyno
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mav1c View Post
Thing is, it's not just HR, or NoVA, or any other particular area. The WHOLE country sucks at driving because it's so damn easy to get a license. Everyone thinks its a right, not a privilege. Given, there are some exceptional retards and d-bags out there, but I would bet they're a retard and/or d-bag no matter what they're doing.
+infinity

Dear everyone in this thread,

Drivers suck everywhere. You are not a beautiful unique snowflake. We are all part of the same compost heap.

Sincerely,
Tyler
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Old 09-21-2011, 10:09 PM   #25
madcatz
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I am a snowflake

Hurrrrr derrr
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