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Old 04-19-2009, 03:13 AM   #1
fokai
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Default Funniest or most unexpected thing you've heard/seen your parents do

When I was young, I always thought my dad was "Mr. Right" and never did anything wrong. He's the typical salty mouthed (retired) sailor. When we lived in Guam, he was the Command Master Chief of the base we lived on. Since he was the CMC of the base, we lived close to his boss the Commanding Officer of the base.

One day he was telling me a story of how him and his buddies got drunk a few nights before. They decided it would be a good idea to climb the roof with their golf clubs and tee off at the CO's (his boss's) house. They got a few balls off when the CO's house lights came on, which they then retreated back down to the car port to drink more beer.

That kind of changed my view of my dad being an angel. Now I realize that he was just trying to set a good example for my brother and I.

So, what's the funniest or most unexpected thing your parents have done?
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:19 AM   #2
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My mom just bought a PS3... For herself...

She called me at work a couple weeks ago and said, "Do I have an HDMI cable?" and I was like, what do you need that for??? Then I LOL'ed when she told me what she got.
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:20 AM   #3
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That's badass, that's where I'm statined at right now
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:22 AM   #4
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That's badass, that's where I'm statined at right now
Big Navy? we were stationed on NCTAMS. It's closed now isn't it
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:24 AM   #5
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Big Navy? we were stationed on NCTAMS. It's closed now isn't it
Yep, I'm on big navy but NCTAMS is still open for housing/barracks.
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:28 AM   #6
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Yep, I'm on big navy but NCTAMS is still open for housing/barracks.
*le sigh* I miss it. I used to always go to Big Navy and swing on the rope where the SEALs train.
Should be visiting next year
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:34 AM   #7
rice h8r
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Kostamojen, how old is she? What games is she planning to play?
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Old 04-19-2009, 03:42 AM   #8
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*le sigh* I miss it. I used to always go to Big Navy and swing on the rope where the SEALs train.
Should be visiting next year
You mean the rope in the reef right behind the south tip area?

They just closed it down 2 months ago because some navy diver got his foot caught in the rope when he was jumping off. He was hanging upside down with a broken leg

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Old 04-19-2009, 03:46 AM   #9
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You mean the rope in the reef right behind the south tip area?

They just closed it down 2 months ago because some navy diver got his foot caught in the rope when he was jumping off. He was hanging upside down with a broken leg

yeeeah my friend took a huge crap into the water off that swing. what has been seen cannot be unseen.
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Old 04-19-2009, 04:34 AM   #10
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I'm reading this from NCTAMS. Lant Norfolk VA
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Old 04-19-2009, 06:38 AM   #11
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*dad talking to me about women and being clear with your actions*
Dad: Do you think your mother is going to take me seriously when I say _____ when I go and bang her every night?

I died a little on the inside with that one.

Most surprising story? Probably when he told me that he cut off a cadaver's nuts back in medical school and put them in some girl's whitecoat. She couldn't tell what it was when she reached in bare handed...until she pulled them out.

Last edited by Physics Junkie; 04-19-2009 at 06:43 AM.
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Old 04-19-2009, 11:49 AM   #12
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My mother and father both drove under the speed limit for as long as I remember. Once day, after I had just turned 21, my mom and I had to go to an appointment somewhere and were running late. She's driving, speed limit is 25 in our neighborhood. I notice she's going a little fast and I see she's going 30. Then 35. Then 45 Then 50 and coming up to a 4-way stop ... which she blows through. I'm freaking out of course, because I've never seen her drive like this and figure she's going to get us both killed, and say something like "Mom! What are you doing?" and she replies "I figure it's about time for you to know how things really work. I only drive super slow and careful when you're in the car so I can set an example. While I don't drive like this all the time, I'll do it if it's really important." Within the next 10 minutes she did 60 in a 35 zone and 85 in a 55 zone.

We got to the appointment on time.

I then knew where I got my driving style from.

My father wasn't faking it ... he always drove slow.
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Old 04-19-2009, 11:54 AM   #13
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My Mother -
Told me the hitter box I found in her room wasn't hers. The weed was grass clippings.

I came home the next day and there was about 10 water bottles on the wet bar in the kitchen and she was veged out on the couch eating potato chips...

I was 18 and probably smoked a few times myself - she was only fooling herself.

She bought a brand new Harley last year too..

-Jerod
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Old 04-19-2009, 11:54 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RS25.com View Post
My mother and father both drove under the speed limit for as long as I remember. Once day, after I had just turned 21, my mom and I had to go to an appointment somewhere and were running late. She's driving, speed limit is 25 in our neighborhood. I notice she's going a little fast and I see she's going 30. Then 35. Then 45 Then 50 and coming up to a 4-way stop ... which she blows through. I'm freaking out of course, because I've never seen her drive like this and figure she's going to get us both killed, and say something like "Mom! What are you doing?" and she replies "I figure it's about time for you to know how things really work. I only drive super slow and careful when you're in the car so I can set an example. While I don't drive like this all the time, I'll do it if it's really important." Within the next 10 minutes she did 60 in a 35 zone and 85 in a 55 zone.

We got to the appointment on time.

I then knew where I got my driving style from.

My father wasn't faking it ... he always drove slow.
I can remember when I was about 7 or 8 I was riding in my mom's '79 Plymouth Volarie with my dad. I asked him what a burnout was. He stopped in the middle of this big hill and put the car in Neutral. Rolled backwards down the hill probably about 20 yards with the motor revved (IIRC it was an old straight 6, maybe even an old 283....?) and slapped it into Drive. The car smoked the rears, going backwards about 10 feet, then started forward motion, still smoking tires. When we were finished my dad looked at me and said, "That's a burnout, and a pretty good one too." There was a huge J burned into the pavement there for a while
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Old 04-19-2009, 12:26 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by Damn Yankee View Post
I can remember when I was about 7 or 8 I was riding in my mom's '79 Plymouth Volarie with my dad. I asked him what a burnout was. He stopped in the middle of this big hill and put the car in Neutral. Rolled backwards down the hill probably about 20 yards with the motor revved (IIRC it was an old straight 6, maybe even an old 283....?) and slapped it into Drive. The car smoked the rears, going backwards about 10 feet, then started forward motion, still smoking tires. When we were finished my dad looked at me and said, "That's a burnout, and a pretty good one too." There was a huge J burned into the pavement there for a while


The one thing mom did that actually floored me was to ask me to get her high. This woman doesn't get drunk. Hell, she doesn't even drink except for once or twice a year. Never smoked cigarettes. Now I know she sold pot when I was a baby to help ends meet (being a single mom does that to people), but she claimed (and I believe her) she never tried any of it.

"I'm an old woman, I just want to try it once to see what the hub-bub is about."

Yes, she did use the word "hub-bub".
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Old 04-19-2009, 05:33 PM   #16
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Kostamojen, how old is she? What games is she planning to play?
60+ and she got it for the Blueray
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Old 04-19-2009, 05:50 PM   #17
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My dad told me that he did LSD when he was young, and that he was in the middle of a lake swimming... dragging a canoe's rope with his teeth. He said he thought he was the first man on earth.
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Old 04-19-2009, 05:59 PM   #18
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My dad told me that he did LSD when he was young, and that he was in the middle of a lake swimming... dragging a canoe's rope with his teeth. He said he thought he was the first man on earth.
nice!
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Old 04-19-2009, 06:10 PM   #19
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My mom told me she tried LSD in college and sat at the end of a driveway playing in sand. Also, when she told my brother and me (but not our younger siblings at the time) about the birds and the bees, she told us, "so your father and I had to do it FOUR TIMES." < dramatic chipmunk >

I think I walked in on them a year or two later, but it was dark. There was some climbing around - forward cowgirl, maybe - but nothing graphic. I quickly walked out without further investigation.
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Old 04-19-2009, 06:17 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fuzz541 View Post
My mom told me she tried LSD in college and sat at the end of a driveway playing in sand. Also, when she told my brother and me (but not our younger siblings at the time) about the birds and the bees, she told us, "so your father and I had to do it FOUR TIMES." < dramatic chipmunk >

I think I walked in on them a year or two later, but it was dark. There was some climbing around - forward cowgirl, maybe - but nothing graphic. I quickly walked out without further investigation.
pics of mom
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Old 04-19-2009, 06:19 PM   #21
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my mom fended off/ beat up 3 dudes at once before she had me.

heard this from 2 of my moms friends and my dad so I'm guessing it's true
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Old 04-19-2009, 06:35 PM   #22
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My dad is by no means racist but sometimes he says things... bluntly.

Me, my dad, and my bro-in-law were chilling on a patio seating area at a restaurant/pub place knocking back a few beers. It's pretty crowded but not really loud at all. We get on the topic of what liquors we like and my bro-in-law mentions something about Hennessey. My dad says (WAY too loudly): "You know who likes Hennessey? The black people."

My BiL and I both turned red and sank into our seats as we noticed several people of the above mentioned race turn and stare us down

9 points for dad I guess
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Old 04-19-2009, 06:47 PM   #23
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pics of mom
No pics of mom, but how about my sister?

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Old 04-19-2009, 07:02 PM   #24
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When we were younger, my Dad would always make sure my brother, sister and I ate everything on our plates. If we did this, he'd tell us we were "clean platers."

About a year ago I visited the parents with my sister and my Dad made ribs. After we'd had a pile of them down, he looked at what we'd finished and announced "Clean Boners!!"
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Old 04-19-2009, 07:12 PM   #25
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Right after that Imus thing with the Rutgers Women's B-Ball Team, I go to visit Rutgers campus with my parents. Its some big "Accepted Students" Day or something so the whole thing starts off in the gym to accomodate(sp?) everyone. My dad, to the Rutgers student greeter at the door who is handing out the pamphlets just says, "So umm, is this where the Nappy Headed Ho's play?" The guy just starts cracking up.

I thought it was hilarious.
ibpoints
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