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Old 01-23-2003, 11:52 AM   #1
chrislehr
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Member#: 24165
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: ATX
Vehicle:
2003 WRX Sedan
World Rally Blue

Default Dear Neon Driver

Who thought it was cool to pull up next to me, hit your rev limiter in between shifts, and ride around in your white neon with black steelies, a huge fart can and no tint, and an UGLY ass sticker (and dont forget the ever important fire extinguisher on the a-pillar!)

Dear sir,

If you are to pull up to a WRX, rev, and have him follow you for a little bit (notice, follow, NOT race) Please don't speed up to 130 and put your hazards on. It wasnt a race, and you are a dumbass.

Disrespectfully yours,
Chris Lehr
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Old 01-23-2003, 12:04 PM   #2
mad-dog999
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Member#: 4347
Join Date: Feb 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Manch Vegas
Vehicle:
2006 2.5i Wagon
Aspen White

Default

Whoa! He had a fart tip AND stickers! No wonder he 0wn3d you! He's putting down at LEAST 400hp to the wheels with those mods!

It's interesting the people you meet on the roads. Some are a bit stranger than others, and some are a bit more delusional as well. He he...

-John
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Old 01-23-2003, 12:19 PM   #3
Kha0S
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: WRJ, VT
Vehicle:
2011 WRX
DGM 5D

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I'll make sure Kris gets this... he never listens...

/Andrew
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Old 01-23-2003, 12:24 PM   #4
re92
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Member#: 4715
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Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Pass the Butt Aid
Vehicle:
Big balls, no brain

Default

Dear Audi A4 driver,

When I am waiting at a traffic light on a one lane road, do not create an extra lane next to me and try to beat me when the light turns green. Given that my humble wagon makes a whole lot more power than your spiffy sedan, and weighs a whole lot less, you will get your arse handed to you. Even if you chirp your tires and I don't.

As you discovered yourself.

Thank you,
Raj
PS: Creeping forward before the light turns green is cheating.
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Old 01-23-2003, 12:25 PM   #5
paultg
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Member#: 437
Join Date: Oct 1999
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Londonderry, NH
Default

Quote:
I'll make sure Kris gets this... he never listens...


I'm betting it was one of those SRt-4's.. you got owned..

Paul G.
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Old 01-23-2003, 01:01 PM   #6
Kha0S
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Location: WRJ, VT
Vehicle:
2011 WRX
DGM 5D

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Dear Ford Focus,

Don't try to keep me from getting in front of you before these two lanes merge back together after this traffic light.

You'll just get embarrassed.

/Andrew
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Old 01-23-2003, 01:04 PM   #7
Thug
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Join Date: Dec 1999
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Norfeast
Default

Dear non-highschool graduating Sears tire monkey,

I saw you pull out of the garage at mach 3 in my car. If you ever do that again I will use the tire mounting machine to disembowel you.


Sincerely,
Angry in Everett
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Old 01-23-2003, 01:13 PM   #8
paultg
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Location: Londonderry, NH
Default

Quote:
I saw you pull out of the garage at mach 3 in my car. If you ever do that again I will use the tire mounting machine to disembowel you.


Paul G.
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Old 01-23-2003, 01:35 PM   #9
joe z
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Member#: 599
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Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Manchvegas
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2007 Impreza Sti
UGM

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muahaaahah nice visual nate
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Old 01-23-2003, 01:40 PM   #10
JGard
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Chapter/Region: TXIC
Location: Austin, TX
Vehicle:
2017 Impreza Sport
E36 M3/4/5

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dear pedestrian

I know my car is 30 years old. But I'm sorry, you cannot hit 30mph faster than I can, if at all. Next time, stop looking over at me, laughing, pointing, then lounging forward when the light turns green.

I'm confident, that if my car is actually running, that'll I'll be able to beat you pretty handily.

sincerely,
too cold to start.
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:04 PM   #11
sorbee711
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Member#: 14259
Join Date: Jan 2002
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Shrewsbury, MA
Vehicle:
OT, we're a-holes
b/c we are bored at work

Smile

Dear Acura GS-R,
When you see that I also have a GS-R (used to) and we are side-by-side at a light, please don't think that means I want to race. I know you failed to comprehend why I didn't want to race especially when I pointed out the guy on the bicycle about 200 ft down the road in my lane, but we aren't racing just because you took off like a flaming idiot spewing smoke out of your busted engine. Also nice huge aluminum wing.

Sincerely,
Jack Mehoff
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:11 PM   #12
KC
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Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: RI/SE Mass
Vehicle:
17 Imp Spurt
00 S2k

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Dear SUV Driver....

Go right ahead.

Sincerely,
Patience W. Thin
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:18 PM   #13
jsnow
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Member#: 14335
Join Date: Jan 2002
Chapter/Region: BAIC
Location: Planet Motorcycle
Default

Dear Geo Metro With Dual Fart-Pipes,

Your three cylinder engine sounds like a bumblebee on steroids with your twin fart pipe exhaust.

Moreover, it's really funny that, in this cold weather, I only see steam coming out of one of your exhaust tips.

(It really was pretty goofy. Imagine an electric toothbrush on its highest setting. That's basically what it sounded like.)
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:27 PM   #14
Kaiser
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Member#: 7170
Join Date: Jun 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Vehicle:
Aut Kaiser,
aut nullus.

Default

Dear Old Bastard in the SUV across from me at that intersection in Darien today,

Just because you've always jumped the green light in order to make your left turn (thereby cutting off the opposing traffic that's going straight) doesn't mean you won't come up against someone like me someday.

Today was that day. Here's what tipped me off: the fact that you'd already turned your wheels fully left and were halfway into the intersection before the light even turned green. Not turning your blinker on ALMOST fooled me, btw. As I made it into the intersection first, making your wait your turn (as the traffic laws state you should), please don't misconstrue my slowing to 3mph as anything other than a physical display of my utter contempt for drivers like you.

You get NOTHING. You LOSE. Good DAY, sir.

Deprecatingly yours,
Kai

P.S. BOOYAM. +2.
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:28 PM   #15
m750
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Member#: 2278
Join Date: Sep 2000
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Pepperell MA
Vehicle:
8Sti | 07 allez
White | Comp

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Dear self,
I wanted to remind you that AWD only makes you go better in the snow, and not stop any better. Before you get any crazy ideas, just because snowbanks are made out of snow, does not mean they are soft.
AO
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:29 PM   #16
Kaiser
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Member#: 7170
Join Date: Jun 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Vehicle:
Aut Kaiser,
aut nullus.

Default

Quote:
Originally posted by KC
Dear SUV Driver....
Go right ahead.
Sincerely,
Patience W. Thin

Dear Mr. Thin,

I didn't see your post before writing mine. I now look like a complete psycho.

Thank you and kind regards,
Kai

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Old 01-23-2003, 02:33 PM   #17
jsnow
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Chapter/Region: BAIC
Location: Planet Motorcycle
Default

Quote:
Originally posted by Kaiser
I didn't see your post before writing mine. I now look like a complete psycho.
Not at all.
Quote:
You get NOTHING. You LOSE. Good DAY, sir.
You look like a complete psycho because Gene Wilder looked like a complete psycho when he said that.



Sincerely,
Charlie Bucket
Golden Ticket #5
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Old 01-23-2003, 02:40 PM   #18
de Rookie
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Member#: 27636
Join Date: Oct 2002
Chapter/Region: International
Vehicle:
I haz 183
IggPoints

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Dear Albino White Civic hatchback,

Please do not rev your engine at me when I am happily using the HOV lane (high occupancy vehicle lane for you non-Texans) and hardly exceeding the speed limit. I'm sorry that you revved and revved and I didn't even look over to give you the time of day. My girlfriend thought there was a bumblebee on crack in the car, but I assured her it was only a Civic. And even when you dropped you clutch and blew up your engine I still did not alter my speed. The only thought that crossed my mind was, "wow, that white smoke DOES match your paint nicely", as you slowed down and cut off three lanes of traffic to park your dismembered machine and call a tow truck.

Regards and best wishes

Mike
http://kanedasrealm.net
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Old 01-23-2003, 04:21 PM   #19
xtheviperx
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Member#: 17580
Join Date: Apr 2002
Chapter/Region: TXIC
Location: North Dallas
Vehicle:
2002 Impreza WRX
Platinum Silver Metallic

Default

Quote:
Originally posted by rajito
Dear Audi A4 driver,

PS: Creeping forward before the light turns green is cheating.
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Old 01-23-2003, 04:34 PM   #20
JoeBloggz23
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Member#: 4612
Join Date: Mar 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Fairhaven,MA
Vehicle:
2014 Forester XT
Satin white pearl

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Dear 12 yr old boy in the back seat of moms Dodge Aries cruising at 30mph,

Please do not wait for me to pull up, roll down the window, and exclaim in your poor English grammar, "Burn the rubber"!! Now I know he does not know this but, there are but a handful of cars they can lay a patch while cruising at 30mph, let alone an AWD 4cylinder turbo!!
God, American children have to be smarter than this, dont they?????

Eric
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Old 01-23-2003, 06:54 PM   #21
jamz
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Member#: 8725
Join Date: Jul 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Portland MAINE
Vehicle:
2013 Black Company
Annalist

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Dear ass-tards:

I own you all in my huge SUV. Your puny mortal vehicles are naught but speedbumps in my path, and small ones at that. Stay out of my way in parking lots, interstates, side roads and driveways, and we will get along fine.

My truck is superior in size, weight, momentum, static and dynamic energy, and smog production. I can do what I want. I have to step *down* from my cab just to get down to your level, you diminutive, nasal, whining little irritants.

I drive an SUV. I am HUGE. I am IRONMAN. I have SPEED DIAL. I can put on MASCARA, EAT a FAST FOOD BURGER, and TALK TO my BROKER or DAUGHTER'S SOCCER COACH. I have everything, and embody everything that's great about consumerism.


Regards,

45% of the driving public.





who can tell I'm driving a rental Ford Explorer SUV for the first time?
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Old 01-23-2003, 07:56 PM   #22
rkkwan
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Member#: 5596
Join Date: Apr 2001
Chapter/Region: TXIC
Location: Houston, TX
Vehicle:
2010 Honda Fit Sport
Black

Default

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Senior Citizens in a Mercury Grand Marquis:

Sorry for honking at you on I-195 today. That seems to give you a scare. However, please note that it is simply not cool to drive at 35MPH on the left-hand lane of an interstate highway when the road is mostly clear. Also, when you finally decide to switch lanes, it doesn't help to slow down any more to 25MPH.

I know that you have probably contributed a lot to this country, but you might consider staying off the interstates, or have somebody drive you. Otherwise, you're going to be run over by someone soon.

Sincerely,
-Ray
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Old 01-23-2003, 08:29 PM   #23
Ru fan
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Member#: 1605
Join Date: Jun 2000
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Middletown, CT USA
Vehicle:
1997 1.8L Brighton
NESIC TrackH0z member#1

Default Re: Dear Neon Driver..

Quote:
Originally posted by chrislehr
...no tint...

Disrespectfully yours,
Chris Lehr
Not to start a flame war, but what does this have to do with anything?

Later,
Seth E.
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Old 01-23-2003, 08:58 PM   #24
caligula
Scooby Newbie
 
Member#: 11769
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Nashua,NH
Vehicle:
2002 Impreza WRX
Silver

Default

Dear Mr. Buick,

Just because you have your turn singal on while right beside me, does not give you the right to come into my lane. I didn't honk my horn because I was horny! I honked it because you were coming right into passenger side door.

Sincerly,
Gordon Shumway
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Old 01-23-2003, 10:10 PM   #25
Fuzz541
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Member#: 4739
Join Date: Mar 2001
Chapter/Region: NESIC
Location: Jiangxi, China
Default Re: Re: Dear Neon Driver..

Quote:
Originally posted by Ru fan
Originally posted by chrislehr
...no tint...

Disrespectfully yours,
Chris Lehr

Not to start a flame war, but what does this have to do with anything?

Later,
Seth E.
I think he was just giving us the full picture of the cheesiness. The stark-bright vinyl interior of the black-bumper sohc base neon.

Here's mine:

Dear motorist:

When I am on my way to an ongoing domestic assault call, running Code 3 in the left lane of [insert as appropriate: interstate; four-lane rural road; whatever], and I come up behind you in a 4,500# Crown Victoria with more lights and sirens than an airport fire truck, please carefully and quickly slow down and pull to the right as soon as it is safe to do so. Please refrain from stopping against the left median or continuing along at 20mph.

Fuzz
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