Finally swung the motor in - as far as we know all plugs and wires are hooked up properly. Tomorrow morning we'll be checking fuses, etc. I'll bring the laptop and cable to see if DeltaDash could tell me anything. I hope my aftermarket alarm isn't doing something silly.
Is there anything specific these cars are known for doing when sitting for 6+ months?
EDIT: My dumb ass missed that FAT ground wire bundle that attaches to the driver's side of the intake manifold..