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Old 12-30-2008, 12:23 PM   #1
steve
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Default Is anyone looking for a place to live in Vancouver?

From http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/rnr/964514051.html


Quote:
All the tenants I interview aren't good enough (Broadway and Commercial)
Reply to: pers-964514051@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-12-19, 6:05PM PST


I am a born again Christian. Why is this a problem for people????! I have a house that's MINE and I PAID FOR IT. I also have a basement apartment for rent. It's a great space for I'm charing very little for it, $480 monthly, for the right tenant. I know it's ILLEGAL to require a Christian in the apartment, against the human rights. That's why I NEVER put this in my ad. Why then does it keep getting taken down?

HERE IS THE AD I POSTED, AND THE AD THAT KEEPS GETTING REMOVED:

Available Immediately – Broadway and Commercial – Showing Saturday and Sunday – Email for directions and additional information.

What kind of apartment is it?

• One bedroom basement apartment with separate entrance
• Tastefully decorated with modern décor
• Approximately 650 square feet
• There is even a window! Security bars installed for your safety and to prevent unauthorized activity
• Closed circuit camera installed for security and safety. One in your suite, one at the entrance, and one in the exercise yard

Rent:
• $480.00 per month
• First month’s rent + ˝ month security deposit due at move in
• Small pet allowed with approval and payment of additional ˝ month pet damage deposit
• One year lease permitted, option to renew lease at end of the term with no increase in rent
• LANDLORD’S SPECIAL! Move in before January 1st and don’t pay for the remainder of December! That’s significant savings.

Included in the rent:

• Electricity
• Heat – Maintained at 21 degrees with lock box to prevent unauthorized tampering. Additional heating available for $20.00 per extra degree of heating per month. You may not use your oven to heat the apartment. If you do, you will be fined $50.00 per occurrence.
• Air conditioning – Maintained at 25 degrees during the summer with lock box to prevent extra cooling from being dispensed. Additional cooling for sale for $20.00 per degree of cooling requested per month.
• 25" Zenith color television set with basic cable service - INCLUDED IN RENT!
• Wireless internet (with content filter applied to block forbidden/immoral websites) - INCLUDED IN RENT!
• Provision of coin laundry services - You will have your own personal coin laundry washer and dryer machines. Washers and dryers are paid using a token system. Tokens can be purchased through the landlord. Washer tokens cost $4.15 each and dryer tokens cost $3.60 each. You are not allowed to use foreign currency or slugs in the washer and dryer. Violators will be fined $100.00 per infraction.

About us: (Landlords)

We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life. My wife stays at home and teaches our home-schooled children. I work as a pastor at a local congregation and am active in the faith community.

About you: (Tenant)

• You are employed
• You do not participate in lascivious deviant sexual behavior
• You do not choose alternative lifestyles as your lifestyle
• You do not have any criminal history
• You must have excellent character references
• You do not smoke, drink or take drugs. Mandatory drug screening required.


Additional Rules/Conditions:

CLEANLINESS: You are responsible for the cleanliness and orderliness of
your apartment. Beds are to be made before leaving your suite,
countertops must be wiped down, and you must remove all trash. Upon
inspection, if the tenant's basement suite is not clean, the cost of
cleaning services plus a fine of $100.00 will be levied.

LIGHTS: The lights in your basement suite and in the day room are not to
be tampered with. If a light needs repair, report the condition to the
Landlord.

WAKE-UP: Wake up will be at 5:30am each morning. All ceiling lights in
the suite will be turned on automatically.


LIGHTS OUT: Ceiling lights in the suite will be turned off at 11:30pm.

CONTRABAND: The following items are considered contraband – alcohol, illegal drugs, tobacco, weapons, lock picking equipment. If any contraband is discovered to be in your possession, you will be subject to a minimum $1,000.00 fine. In addition, your items will be confiscated permanently. Second offense – you will be evicted without notice. A bailiff will escort you and your belongings off the premises. Your security deposit will not be returned.

SMOKING: The basement suite is non-smoking. Anyone in possession of tobacco products of any kind or any lighter or matches, will have their
contraband items confiscated and will be fined $100.00.


INSPECTIONS: The Landlord will conduct unannounced inspections to ensure that these rules and regulations are being followed.

VISITATION: Visitation periods will be on Saturdays and Sundays from 1:00 p.m. until 3:00 p.m. All visitors and their vehicles are subject
to search while on landlord property
. Refusal to allow a search can result in their being barred from all future visitation privileges. All
visitors must sign the Visitor's Log. Unauthorized visitors will be escorted from the property, and the tenant will be fined $250.00.

I.D. BRACELETS: Each tenant will be issued an I.D. bracelet with his/her photograph. It must be worn at all times. If you lose your I.D.
bracelet or it is broken, you will be required to purchase a new one at the nominal cost of $5.00.


EXERCISE YARD: The tenant will have access to the exercise yard in the area to the back of the property for 2 hours per day from 4:00 pm to
6:00 pm. The tenant is not allowed to bring any personal property to the exercise yard
. Once the tenant leaves the exercise yard on a
particular day, he or she may not return. No boisterous behavior is allowed in the exercise yard. There is no smoking allowed in the
exercise yard. Minimum fine for exercise yard infractions is $50.00



classic!
* Registered users of the site do not see these ads.

Last edited by steve; 12-30-2008 at 12:38 PM. Reason: bolded for hilarity
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Old 12-30-2008, 12:27 PM   #2
shawmacs
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$20.00/month/degree.


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Old 12-30-2008, 12:40 PM   #3
steve
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Makes me wonder if the guy is 6'6", 275lbs, pissed off, and hung like a buick.
He sure talks like he is.

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Old 12-30-2008, 12:42 PM   #4
bikergreen
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Wow!.....
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Old 12-30-2008, 12:59 PM   #5
Drakar
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hahaha when can I move into "Camp Fun"
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Old 12-30-2008, 01:15 PM   #6
cyron
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isnt he describing jail?
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Old 12-30-2008, 01:19 PM   #7
Cyclonus
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cyron View Post
isnt he describing jail?
looks like it
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Old 12-30-2008, 01:20 PM   #8
jimbo123
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isn't that a joke??
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Old 12-30-2008, 01:24 PM   #9
Anthony Prez
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oh my... can that be real?
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Old 12-30-2008, 01:50 PM   #10
Yannerd
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Damn it where's the reply button to that ad?
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:09 PM   #11
Qbase
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got that sent to me on my email. its been goin around for a pass few days now. odd
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:17 PM   #12
Chp_Stix
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dbl post

Last edited by Chp_Stix; 12-30-2008 at 02:24 PM.
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:21 PM   #13
Chp_Stix
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is this the "hey I paid to live in a jail???" is this serious???? I am responding to the add I cant resist!!!
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:38 PM   #14
Yannerd
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I think it's probably a joke... though this guy has definitely touched on some sensitive topics.
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:45 PM   #15
Chp_Stix
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My reply to him
Quote:
Are you serious???

You wonder why you cannot find a renter? Look at my email address before you reply. I am a born again Charismatic Christian and I was a youth pastor with a degree in Theology from Alberta Bible College located in Calgary Alberta. https://www.abc-ca.org/, I am also a Graduate of Masters Commission International, http://www.mcin.org/. And I would not want to live in your building, It might be nice and it might be very clean and quite but I would not want my private life subjected to the inspection of someone I dont know, I have accountability partners in various Canadian cities and they are everything from senior pastors to youth pastors and everything in between. I have been to Cambodia, Thailand, Hong Kong and Singapore on Missions trips and I have nothing to hide about the details of my life but I would not want myself or my friends subject to random searches.

Now I understand you want to uphold the values that you believe in but there is a limit to which you can impose your beliefs on others. Jesus came to this earth not to condemn man but to liberate man from the shackles of the devil. It is not your personal job to force your beliefs on to others but to live a life of example to them and pray for them. It would be most effective for you to reach non-believers to have somewhat "normal" people in your house with normal rules of the house hold, when it is acceptable to be quite noise restrictions. Not to go as far as to control the heat and lighting, that is going to far. Some people dont wake up at 5:30am and others dont mind staying up late some nights to watch a movie. Your renters are not your 5 year old kids or inmates in a jail.

By you posting this response to your add you paint Christians in such a bad light as people who just want to impose rules on others and this whole militant view on Christianity. It hurts me personally because I have spent the last 5 years of my life trying to find a balance of living a christian life and living a life where I have friends outside of the church in which I can demonstrate a christian life without force and without preaching it to them at any given moment but rather make opportunities for people to ask. The best witness you can have to the world is not to stand on a corner and preach hell fire and condemnation, but rather to live a life of influence and values that stand out above the crowd. You work in a church so I understand your contact with "the world" may be limited but try it sometimes, make a friend who isnt christian and see where it goes, you dont have to allow them to influence your choices but rather you may influence theirs, if they want to have a beer with lunch dont worry about it their values are different, you just order your ice tea or whatever you want. But over time they will notice that something is different and they will ask questions. It is not your job to judge man as a pastor but rather you are a shepherd guiding the herd and leave the judgement to God on the day he returns.

You may be surprised at what he has to say to you?! What if he asks you why you were so forceful in your expression of his love and why you pushed people away from him other then loving people for who they are and drawing them in. In my limited time as a christian and minister I have seen more people of a questionable lifestyle and choices come to Jesus then people who were already living "a perfect" lifestyle. Jesus hung out with the delinquents by the way and his friends were prostitutes and thieves. Those were the people he choose to influence, because he knew the religious people of the time already thought they were fine and didnt need saving.

Just a thought for you to chew on

Kris Ouellette
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Old 12-30-2008, 03:02 PM   #16
007WRX
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I'm looking for a place to live, but nothing like that lol.
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Old 12-30-2008, 03:26 PM   #17
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Sounds like my Ex-Girlfriends Dad . . . . .
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Old 12-30-2008, 03:47 PM   #18
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This thread made me laugh so much, I forwarded it at work to the usual crowd, included in this group is a City of Surrey employee who was very offended and knows the legalities of his post.

Obviously imposing and sort of "visitors hours", "drug testing", prohibiting LEGAL substances, sexual and religious beliefs, and many other "fines" is illegal. He is now attempting to go to the CoV to inform this citizen of his rights as a landlord.

I just thought it was a good chuckle.
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Old 12-30-2008, 04:02 PM   #19
Anthony Prez
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im pretty sure that ad was to get a rise out of christians....
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Old 12-30-2008, 04:04 PM   #20
Chp_Stix
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bloody hell i hate religious types
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Old 12-30-2008, 05:13 PM   #21
6th gear
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Well, there goes the neighborhood.
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Old 12-30-2008, 06:21 PM   #22
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thats fricken ridiculous, nowhere in the bible doe it say you can't drink, they are messed up. They are probably those messed up religious fanatics.
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Old 12-30-2008, 08:02 PM   #23
H5N1
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Well, hopefully this is a joke
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Old 12-30-2008, 08:58 PM   #24
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lol

Kris, any reply from the guy?
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Old 12-30-2008, 09:21 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scooby-King View Post
Sounds like my Ex-Girlfriends Dad . . . . .
wow...your sex life must suck!!
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