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Old 10-04-2012, 06:48 PM   #526
Guardian-X-
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holy ***** ... i wouldn't want to be standing near that thing. Must have been a bad case of rubbing in the fenderwell lol

Also "Not sure if overinflated afterwards for the lulz" ...
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Old 10-04-2012, 10:52 PM   #527
340Duster
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unabomber View Post


Found this awesome subforum on reddit via jalopnik today:

http://www.reddit.com/r/Justrolledintotheshop/
That looks like the el cheapo snow tires I bought for my WRX
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Old 10-04-2012, 11:59 PM   #528
rudymcskoody
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unabomber

Found this awesome subforum on reddit via jalopnik today:

http://www.reddit.com/r/Justrolledintotheshop/
Separated belts?
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Old 10-05-2012, 06:21 AM   #529
BSP671
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Reminds me of bad hairstyle from the 70's
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Old 10-05-2012, 08:48 AM   #530
Mak Impreza
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I have another one I need to post pics on. Looks like they took a big can opener to the side of their car. The corvette isn't going to get worked on for awhile now since it is in a legal battle now. So it was gone before I could get a pic.
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Old 10-05-2012, 05:03 PM   #531
Millhouse_5
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A friend of mine just bought an 05 Ralliart from a local guy. Car seemed legit, ran well and looked like an average car.

We went to repaint the brakes and we tried to take the wheels off. I broke 2 adapters for my torque wrench because the lug nuts were tightened to 200 ft/lb (I managed to get one bolt off, the rest weren't moving)
It's a miracle these wheel studs didn't snap off long ago.
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Old 10-05-2012, 05:05 PM   #532
340Duster
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Millhouse_5 View Post
A friend of mine just bought an 05 Ralliart from a local guy. Car seemed legit, ran well and looked like an average car.

We went to repaint the brakes and we tried to take the wheels off. I broke 2 adapters for my torque wrench because the lug nuts were tightened to 200 ft/lb (I managed to get one bolt off, the rest weren't moving)
It's a miracle these wheel studs didn't snap off long ago.
You were using a torque wrench to take the lugs off?
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Old 10-05-2012, 05:14 PM   #533
bue car
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did we just read a fail in a fail
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Old 10-05-2012, 05:26 PM   #534
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bue car View Post
did we just read a fail in a fail
It would appear so.

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Old 10-05-2012, 05:28 PM   #535
easterbran
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 340Duster

You were using a torque wrench to take the lugs off?
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Old 10-05-2012, 05:30 PM   #536
340Duster
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bue car View Post
did we just read a fail in a fail
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Old 10-05-2012, 06:05 PM   #537
rudymcskoody
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Bahahaha I love this thread.



.....hi mark!
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Old 10-05-2012, 11:18 PM   #538
bugeyetex
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:20 PM   #539
RockNRace03
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no pictures unfortunately. but a buddy of mine wanted to install some stereo stuff in his car. when i took his head unit out there was all kinds of professional grade cables hanging free. at first i thought this was good. until i realized the dealership he bought it from tucked all the wiring including the still live power feed under the rear seat they put a half assed piece of masking tape over the exposed wire. that was an accident waiting to happen, it made it easier on me. but still not cool
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:36 PM   #540
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdub.csu View Post
^^ this.

customer: "blah blah" auto parts store told me my check engine light is for a oxygen sensor how much is that to replace.
Me: Well okay its this to replace but... your car has 6 of them. Do you want to diagnose whats wrong?
customer: I told you whats wrong its an oxygen sensor
I have been a tech and a service writer.

For that customer (because I too have had that customer dozens of times) how I handle it.


"No problem let me get you a quote on that"



Then I write up a quote, book time, no warranty coverage, replacing ALL oxygen sensors in the car.


As I hand them the $500-2500 quote I explain that there will be no guarantee that this will fix anything since we don't actually know what is wrong with the car, and that If it doesn't that I doubt the guy at autozone is going to cover the costs. Then I ask them if they want to just go ahead and have us do it, or do they want us to actually diagnose the car and probably fix it for a lot less than that, since there is a good chance it is something minor. I was very nice about it, and stayed professional. I was VERY good at my job. Despite being an ass hole who hates people with a burning passion on a level even a serial killer wouldn't understand, I am amazing with customer service. Like seriously, I have won awards and big paycheck bonus's for it. I actually did customer service training a couple times at one of my jobs.


At that point they either come to their senses or the piss off out the door. I don't care either way.



The most frustrating job was being a service writer at a Kia dealership. Let me make something extremely clear here. There are NO, NONE, ZERO, people, as stupid as Kia customers. Bar none, the dumbest mother f'ers on earth.

I also hate customers that buy a car and take delivery of it on a hot summer day, then the FIRST cool day, come in rip ass pissed off that their tire pressure warning light is on "I bought a new car so I wouldn't have these problems" F'king idiots. I explain that hot air is big, cool air is small, so if it was 110deg and their tire had 32PSI in it, on a 50deg day that will be somewhere in the mid 20s. That almost never worked, because every one of these mouth breathers don't believe in science or are too f;king stupid to understand it anyway. Then they come out with the line that makes me want to cave their thick head in with a sledgehammer.


"My old car never did this" That is their logic. THEIR F'ING 1987 BUICK NEVER HAD A TIRE PRESSURE WARNING LIGHT GO ON. NO **** YOU GOD DAMNED IDIOT YOUR PIECE OF **** BUICK DIDNT HAVE A F'ING TIRE PRESSURE WARNING SYSTEM.




I actually prayed that they would be hit by a bus and killed as they left.











I have worked in the auto industry for over 20 years, as everything from an OCB (oil change bitch) to a muffler/brake shop wrench monkey to a B tech at a dealerships, to a service writer, and a car audio installer.
Horror stories? I has them.

Last edited by Davenow; 10-07-2012 at 01:44 PM.
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:47 PM   #541
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Like the little old Asian guy who sat on a HOT spring day, in his car, chain smoking, with the windows up and AC off, waiting for me to bring his car in to do an oil change and tire rotation.
I open the door, he gets out, and I get in. Once the gagging and gasping for air stopped, I pulled the car in, head out the window trying not to vomit from the smell, and do the tire rotation and oil change.

Customer takes the car when I am done, comes back in complaining of a vibration in the steering wheel. I have evidently tightened the lug nuts too much. (this is this morons logic of why he now has a vibration)
We explain to him that his tires are pretty old, and look like they haven't been rotated in a while, so the vibration is most likely from an unevenly worn tire or an out of balance tire, and that since that tire was on the rear, he wouldn't have noticed it before.

He says no, I tightened his lug nuts too much. I pull up the TQ specs, and SHOW HIM what they are supposed to be, then show him the TQ stick I used to tighten them.

Not good enough. I tightened them too much.

I take him out to the car, put a TQ wrench on the lugs, and show him they are tq'd to spec.

"they too tigh"

"no, look, see this number here, this is the spec, this wrench is set to that number. Its very important that they are tightened to that number"


"but why they have to be so tiiiggggghhhhhh"

(no lie, he said "tiiiiiiiiiiggghhhhhhhhh") (pronounced "tiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeee", like TIE, but long and drawn out. He was putting weird emphasis on the word to try to make his point)
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:00 PM   #542
Davenow
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Or this idiot old lady.

She comes in, already pissed, already with a "we are going to rip her off" mindset.

We work on her car, some brake work, pads/rotors, stuff like that. Her pedal WAS mush, and low. I pull it out, the pedal is high and nice and firm. Probably better than it was new. (most new cars have air in the lines and could use a good bleed)

She gets in, pulls out, SCREECHES to a stop, comes back walks in RIP **** pissed. We ripped her off, its worse than it was, she is calling the police.

wtf...

We calm her down enough to get her keys to take a look at it. I get in the car (despite her essentially screaming that she doesnt want me anywhere near the car since I stole from her) (wtf did I steal? I am pretty sure she meant ripped her off but she was retarded so that was how she said it)

I again take the car for a short spin. The pedal is high and firm. Feels great, car stops like a dream.

Then it dawns on me. This bitch is about 4 foot 9 with little birth defect midget legs. I pull the car up, say "I know what the problem is, give me a few minutes to fix it right up for you" She replies "hurry up, I am already late for work because of you"

I think to myself "no problem C**T"

I pull the car into one of the back bays where she can't see it. I get out, I go into the break room, get a soda and sit down at the table and drink it. About 15 minutes later, I go back to the bay, get in her car, move the seat up a notch or two, and pull the back around to the front and tell her "you are good to go" she gets in, goes for a spin around the lot, and comes back to tell me it feels great now, and I should have done it right the first time.
















Now, I KNOW, I broke a basic cardinal rule, of not giving the car back to the customer exactly as it was. Same radio station (you shouldnt be screwing with the radio anyway), steering wheel at same angle, ac on or off and at same temp, AND SEAT IN THE SAME POSITION.

But this retard. This half witted part midget, was too god damned stupid to figure out that why she all the sudden couldn't reach the pedals, was because her seat was 3-4 inches back from where it was. Somehow she missed the fact that she had to reach out more for the steering wheel, and decided the problem was that her brake pedal was way lower than it was before.
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:03 PM   #543
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Or the customers that didn't want the Haitian guy working on their car. Not a single one of them had the balls to say what their real problem was. The up side was he thought it was hilarious. He would come over to me, and (without them seeing him) point at them (because they had their faces glued to the show window watching their car like a hawk) and say (in a deep fake southern accent) "ah don't want that n***** workin on mah car"
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:04 PM   #544
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Or the moron inbred texans who heard me speak and that I clearly was not from Texas, and would ask me where I was from, and when I told them New England, would treat me like an ass hole. Because after all, people from the north east are rude.


Because being a dick head to someone that isn't from the south, just because they aren't from the south, isn't rude evidently.
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:20 PM   #545
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One of my first jobs at a "real shop" was at a small local muffler/brake/tune up shop in a semi low income area.


You have a lot of people in these areas, who like to compensate for how poor they are, by buying cars WAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY out of their income level.

They accomplish this by buying them 10+ years old, with 84893278947294793274 miles on them.


Guy comes in with a Range Rover. I already know we are doomed, because it has chrome 3 spoke 20" wheels on it (this was back when 20s were a big deal). Guy is complaining of brake problems. The way he is talking, he is VERY proud to be so baller as to afford a Range Rover.
I get in. Generic swap meet CD player, wiring hanging loose. Not sure if its even mounted all the way. Whatever.

Oh look, FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND MILES Great. This should be fun.

I put it on the lift, remove the lug nuts, jesus these wheels/tires (the tires were mostly bald, and they were mismatched, 3 different brand/model tires on 4 wheels. The wheels (with tire) HAD to weigh 70-80lbs. It was ridiculous. The mark of truly low end wheels.

OK how are the brakes.


Lets see. EVERY rubber line I can see is extremely dry rotted. They ALL need replaced. This is a safety issue.
All 4 wheels, the rotors are toast and the pads are gone. Both fronts are grinding, rears are close.

Both front (could have been rear? I don't honestly remember) calipers are LOCKED. I don't even understand how this car stops.

Parking brake? What parking brake? Its broken. Handle flops like a limp dick.


I start calling around for prices, because we don't even have this thing listed in our books.

$5400 parts and labor.

I don't even mention to him that his serp belt is about to let go, and I am SURE this thing needs every fluid and filter in it replaced. (because I know he won't fix it, because the customers in this particular area only care about their car physically moving, and having spinners and big subs, and refuse to even try to process any logic that their car will soon STOP moving, and they won't be able to floss their whip while its on a flat bed)

He loses his mind. Wants to fight us. Wants to fight me. I make a break for it out the back, because someone has pulled a gun on us over an estimate once before

Cops come, he is already gone, left the lot trying, but failing, to burn rubber. Cops leave after him. I take the rest of the day off in case he comes back with "his boys" (he said he would be back with them since we tried to rip him off like a sucker) (his exact words)

2-3 weeks later I see the range rover sitting on a tote-note lot for sale again. He likely just stopped paying the payments since it was broke, and it got repo'd.

I am SURE it hadn't been repaired and was just waiting for the next buyer who was too stupid to see if the car was a pile of crap, and just wanted something to make them look like they weren't on welfare.



I'm not being racist. These were people of all races and age ranges. This was just a crap area filled with morons.
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:25 PM   #546
meanjoaquin
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Exorcise the demons, brother!
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:34 PM   #547
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Quote:
Originally Posted by meanjoaquin View Post
Exorcise the demons, brother!



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Old 10-07-2012, 02:45 PM   #548
guidojuicehead
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^^^Reserved to respond to the harlequin novel above...

RESPONSE:

Words can not describe how elated I am... As I said before, stories that contain this type of stupidity gives me a mega-boner. I can't wait for the end of the world...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Davenow View Post
Despite being an ass hole who hates people with a burning passion on a level even a serial killer wouldn't understand, I am amazing with customer service.

Last edited by guidojuicehead; 10-07-2012 at 03:07 PM. Reason: took my time to truly examine the awesomeness of these stories.
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Old 10-07-2012, 03:27 PM   #549
RoadKillDMD
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Davenow
Stories full of win
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Old 10-07-2012, 03:44 PM   #550
Black_EG
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Holy **** Dave. Keep them coming!
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