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Old 07-29-2013, 05:45 PM   #1
Tweeter
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Member#: 162238
Join Date: Oct 2007
Chapter/Region: RMIC
Location: CO
Default What's the weirdest way you "blew it" with a member of the opposite sex?

Friends had set me up on a blind date sort of date thing. Well the chick comes over to my house and I recognize her instantly because I've had a few classes with her but never really talked a whole lot. Well we turn out hitting it off immediately and are sitting on the couch laughing and **** like that. We start inching closer and getting a little physical. I was already sweating pretty bad and jittery as **** as I was coming down from 40g of creatine and pretty paranoid about messing it up with this chick.

I was eating Cheetos with one hand and had my other hand around her neck. All of a sudden she grabs my Cheetos hand and shoves it down her pants! I still have a Cheeto in my hand but she doesn't notice because her eyes are closed and she's muttering, "Just work your magic Broseidon! I've never been with a man before". In my head I was like, whoa are you for real? I was still a virgin so I begin flicking and rubbing her clit like it said to do on Google. She starts moaning and tells me to put a finger inside her. I go full retard and grab the Cheeto that was in my hand and start moving it in and out of her vagina like a dildo.

I went from 6 to midnight at this point, and started breathing realy heavy. I remember my vision getting more and more narrow. My heart pounding in my ears. I was at the point of no return. She starts moaning more but completely stops and pulls my hand out of her panties with the Cheeto between my fingers. She screamed "What the **** are you doing!?!?" I felt so ****ing awkward, but I tried to remain alpha so I muttered out "I'm dddaaannnngerously cheesy babbbbbaayyyyyy!". She screams, "What the **** is wrong with you?!?", and stormed out. I never saw that girl again, nor did she ever text me back.
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:46 PM   #2
skywaffles
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Member#: 82470
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cat snatch

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Old 07-29-2013, 05:49 PM   #3
erm016
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Location: SC
Default

I expected better entertainment.
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:50 PM   #4
Meat Supply
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---- Smells like
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well, these things happen..there's always next year
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:50 PM   #5
foothill
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Blue Line
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I got a blowie from a girl on a train in Ukraine once. It was ok.
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:53 PM   #6
Psychoreo
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2015 WRX STI
Terminal black pearl

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tweeter View Post
Friends had set me up on a blind date sort of date thing. Well the chick comes over to my house and I recognize her instantly because I've had a few classes with her but never really talked a whole lot. Well we turn out hitting it off immediately and are sitting on the couch laughing and **** like that. We start inching closer and getting a little physical. I was already sweating pretty bad and jittery as **** as I was coming down from 40g of creatine and pretty paranoid about messing it up with this chick.

I was eating Cheetos with one hand and had my other hand around her neck. All of a sudden she grabs my Cheetos hand and shoves it down her pants! I still have a Cheeto in my hand but she doesn't notice because her eyes are closed and she's muttering, "Just work your magic Broseidon! I've never been with a man before". In my head I was like, whoa are you for real? I was still a virgin so I begin flicking and rubbing her clit like it said to do on Google. She starts moaning and tells me to put a finger inside her. I go full retard and grab the Cheeto that was in my hand and start moving it in and out of her vagina like a dildo.

I went from 6 to midnight at this point, and started breathing realy heavy. I remember my vision getting more and more narrow. My heart pounding in my ears. I was at the point of no return. She starts moaning more but completely stops and pulls my hand out of her panties with the Cheeto between my fingers. She screamed "What the **** are you doing!?!?" I felt so ****ing awkward, but I tried to remain alpha so I muttered out "I'm dddaaannnngerously cheesy babbbbbaayyyyyy!". She screams, "What the **** is wrong with you?!?", and stormed out. I never saw that girl again, nor did she ever text me back.
Puffs or crisps?
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:56 PM   #7
Swizz_dub
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Location: Im just so angry.
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1111 All the time.
Go **** yourself.

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I blew while she was gripping it. went all over her forearm and blue silk dress.
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:58 PM   #8
CatfaceType-R
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So....did you eat the cheeto???
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Old 07-29-2013, 05:59 PM   #9
Vectors2Final
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'15 F80 M3 YMB/SS
No Driving in Korea...

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Cheeto ****er.
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Old 07-29-2013, 06:02 PM   #10
Indocti Discant
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L Bo Hope you meet
the spirit in the sky

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I brought a girl back to my place only to find my friend jacking it in my living room because he locked himself out of his apartment and his wife wasnt answering his phone.



that didnt work out so well because we went out and ran into another girl i was also seeing at the time. No a threesome did not happen.
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Old 07-29-2013, 06:06 PM   #11
MassBugeye
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PSM

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Shouldve used Cool Ranch Doritos
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Old 07-29-2013, 06:10 PM   #12
burnera
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89 325I
i don't know

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I stopped reading at creatine.
Twtr, you need new material.
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Old 07-29-2013, 06:34 PM   #13
Snoopy
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99 Impreza RS
Silverthorn Metallic

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I whispered in her ear "Your sister likes it doggy style too"

And she bucked me off and I fell off the bed and she took off.
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Old 07-29-2013, 06:40 PM   #14
Indocti Discant
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Chapter/Region: BAIC
Location: et ament meminisse periti
Vehicle:
L Bo Hope you meet
the spirit in the sky

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Snoopy View Post
I whispered in her ear "Your sister likes it doggy style too"

And she bucked me off and I fell off the bed and she took off.
that's another version of the rodeo.

you are no cowboy.
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Old 07-29-2013, 07:46 PM   #15
OriginalSin
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Chapter/Region: South East
Location: a fool's parade
Default

looked her in the eyes while making whoopie...
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