Bus Trip From Hell: My First Greyhound Experience

Remy E. LeBeau · 04-17-2003, 02:49 PM

Last weekend I shot down to Cali and because I am such a cheap bastard, I decided that I would try my hand at the Greyhound since it was so darn cheap when it comes to the cost of flying. BIG MISTAKE! I heard stories about how bad it was but come on guys, I had to find out for myself. GOOD GOD I WAS IN HELL....

First was the "SARS" Lady...she looked cambodian and decided that it would be nice for me to listen to her cough for 12 hours straight. I yearned for the chance to say "Hey BITCH, close your mouth!" I decided to keep my face as close as I could to the Air Vents so I could insure that I got somewhat fresh air. Luckily I did not contract "SARS".

Second, I had the pleasure of sitting next to a hispanic man with his baby. The baby enjoyed crying obnoxiously every 20 mins. That means Frankie got no sleep....Also, the kid enjoyed hitting me with its little meaty paw and at first I found this to be cute but it quickly became downright annoying. Little did the baby and father know, but I wanted to punt the baby down the aisle like a football....Oh that would of felt much better..

Lastly, the bull dyke with the shaved head and army boots who felt the need to have her cell phone conversations while the bus was dead quiet. She spoke as loud as anyone could possibly speak and I got to hear her point of view on society and how her friends old BF's were "Losers"....

OVERALL by the end of the trip down, I paid the extra 160.00 to take a plane back up because there was no way in hell I would get on that bus again....I honestly would have shot myself if I had the chance..

Let Me add:

Beef Jerky Boy (who smelled like rotten jerky)
Dreadlocks Man (Fat White dood with dreads, kind like Droz from PCU)
Tweaker Girls (Girls who are damn annoying and publicly discuss how their moms are crackheads)

FF

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HekWRX · 04-17-2003, 02:52 PM

dood, i could never get on a bus with a bunch of strangers with my luck i would the fat farting person next to me. the non-bather infront of me and ton of screaming little trolls......SHUDDER SHUDDER

Kaiser · 04-17-2003, 02:52 PM

Greyhound
by Harry Chapin

It's midnight at the depot
And I drag my bags in line.
Travellin' light, I got to go
But the bus won't be on time.
Everybody's looking half alive.
Later on the bus arrives.

They punch my ticket
I find a seat
And we move out past the lights.
Come on Driver, where's the heat?
It's cold out in the night.
I keep telling to myself that I don't care.
Come tomorrow, I'll be there.

Take the Greyhound.
It's a dog of a way to get around.
Take the Greyhound.
It's a dog gone easy way to get you down.

Tired of watching this night go by
So I look across the aisle.
The window's frosted, I can't sleep
But the girl returns my smile.
She reminds me of someone I knew back home.
So I doze. So it goes.

I'm wrinkled on my stool at the rest stop.
The waitress being cozy with the highway cop.
My coffee's tasting tired.
My eyes roll over dead.
Got to go outside and get the gas out of my head.
Oh, to be in bed.
You got me driving.
I'm on your Greyhound bus and you're driving.

But there's nothing new about Greyhounds.
Nothing new about feeling down.
Nothing new about putting off
Or putting myself on.

Looking to tomorrow is the way the loser hides
I should have realized by now that all my life's a ride.
It's time to find some happy times and make myself some friends
I know there ain't no rainbows waiting when this journey ends.

Stepping off this dirty bus first time I understood
It's got to be the going not the getting there that's good
That's a thought for keeping if I could.
It's got to be the going not the getting there that's good.

---------------------

(funny story behind this song: the Greyhound execs heard Harry made a song about them, got all excited and called his record company to buy the rights and use it in a commercial, etc...without ever having listened to the song.

soon as they did, of course, they changed their minds. greyhound = teh suck)

izhazissuez · 04-17-2003, 02:55 PM

I am in buffalo, and my fire dept was having a ski trip in Killington, Vt. I decided that the greyhound was the easier way to get there. About 4 hours into the trip captain greyhound, guy we thought he knew everything was talking, and captain pissed off, big dude that was yelling at someone on his cell phone. Well at this same time, the bus decides to break down on the side of I-90, 2 hours outside of Albany. THat sucked becuase it was about 30 degrees and snowing at the time, and of course we had no heat. From what I say greyhound is the end all be all devil!

alf

Johnny Knoxville · 04-17-2003, 02:58 PM

thats a funny story man

Remy E. LeBeau · 04-17-2003, 03:00 PM

I mean it was THAT bad....I honestly wanted to punch the driver and take over the bus and run it off a cliff..............the first 2 days of my vacation were ruined cause I went through so much....so much trauma...I didnt leave my hotel room....

FF

TFW · 04-17-2003, 03:00 PM

I had a friend just get off a greyhound bus in the middle of no where. He seriously would have rather walked to a phone in a city he didn't know and figure it out from there instead of spend a minute more on the greyhound. He said that he was about to completely loose it can start going into hysterics. He had:

The smelly COUPLE.
The Fat guy
3 infants, 2 of which were sick and crying.
The 'talker'
The 'open mouth breather with rancid breath'
The 'chews with their mouth open obese woman who won't stop eating the ENTIRE trip'
The couple having a fight in spanish in the back.

He got off the bus somewhere in nevada I think, and made arrangements to get to an airport and fly the rest of the way. After hearing that, i'll do my best to never set foot on a greyhound bus.

-T

beethoven · 04-17-2003, 03:01 PM

If you want a nice travelling experience, try Amtrak. It's not as fast as flying, but the views are better, the seats are bigger, and the food is tastier.

HekWRX · 04-17-2003, 03:03 PM

its cheap for a reason! holy crap this thread solidifies my perception. thank you for letting me learn from your mistakes.

Remy E. LeBeau · 04-17-2003, 03:04 PM

Seriously dont do it! I consider myself extremely peaceful but I was on the verge of killing people...

FF

GooseMan · 04-17-2003, 03:05 PM

I dunno...last year I took a Greyhound down to NYC.....wasnt so bad. There was a hot chick sitting behind me, and some dude from London, so we all talked about cool UK cars (scoobies) and stuff for the duration of the ride. Plus I got the chicks number

The way home wasnt so bad cause the bus was empty half way...I was stuck sitting next to some punkass rapper kid, but I gave him a look of death, and he moved seats.

Sirkbac · 04-17-2003, 03:05 PM

My uncle did the greyhound bus thing one time. A fight broke out at the change over and shots were fired, one hitting the wall inches over his shoulder.

HekWRX · 04-17-2003, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GooseMan
I dunno...last year I took a Greyhound down to NYC.....wasnt so bad. There was a hot chick sitting behind me, and some dude from London, so we all talked about cool UK cars (scoobies) and stuff for the duration of the ride. Plus I got the chicks number

The way home wasnt so bad cause the bus was empty half way...I was stuck sitting next to some punkass rapper kid, but I gave him a look of death, and he moved seats.

I think those odds are against you..Hot chicks generally don't ride buses. buses=trasportation for commoners. sad but true

Remy E. LeBeau · 04-17-2003, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by HekWRX

I think those odds are against you..Hot chicks generally don't ride buses. buses=trasportation for commoners. sad but true

I actually did sit next to a semi attractive girl but she was 16 and told me about her 10 brothers and sisters and that killed it for me....yea....suck

GooseMan · 04-17-2003, 03:11 PM

hot chicks dont have money.

ever notice that? the HOTTEST girls always drive the crappiest cars....

Brad Pittiful · 04-17-2003, 03:13 PM

Frankie, next time ride with Harry Chapin atleast he didnt have any annoying smelly fat loud dyky peeps with him on his ride...btw how was the toilet on the bus?

HekWRX · 04-17-2003, 03:15 PM

i guess i am to accustom to seeing hot university chicks in nice cars. Baylor=capital of daddy's little gir. I knew girls who flew to houston, dallas and austin every weekend or every other weekend. l

Remy E. LeBeau · 04-17-2003, 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Brad Pittiful
Frankie, next time ride with Harry Chapin atleast he didnt have any annoying smelly fat loud dyky peeps with him on his ride...btw how was the toilet on the bus?

Toilet? HELL NO i did not venture to the back of the bus to use that nasty pot. I just held it in till the next stop.

FF

KC · 04-17-2003, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GooseMan
hot chicks dont have money.

ever notice that? the HOTTEST girls always drive the crappiest cars....

OMG. I almost made a post about this very subject last night.

Saw on driving like a 1982 Chevette... but wow. Tite gina!

Quote:

I was stuck sitting next to some punkass rapper kid, but I gave him a look of death, and he moved seats.

Any look that you have is enough to scare people away.

04-17-2003, 02:49 PM	#1
Remy E. LeBeau Scooby Specialist Member#: 4714 Join Date: Mar 2001	Bus Trip From Hell: My First Greyhound Experience Last weekend I shot down to Cali and because I am such a cheap bastard, I decided that I would try my hand at the Greyhound since it was so darn cheap when it comes to the cost of flying. BIG MISTAKE! I heard stories about how bad it was but come on guys, I had to find out for myself. GOOD GOD I WAS IN HELL.... First was the "SARS" Lady...she looked cambodian and decided that it would be nice for me to listen to her cough for 12 hours straight. I yearned for the chance to say "Hey BITCH, close your mouth!" I decided to keep my face as close as I could to the Air Vents so I could insure that I got somewhat fresh air. Luckily I did not contract "SARS". Second, I had the pleasure of sitting next to a hispanic man with his baby. The baby enjoyed crying obnoxiously every 20 mins. That means Frankie got no sleep....Also, the kid enjoyed hitting me with its little meaty paw and at first I found this to be cute but it quickly became downright annoying. Little did the baby and father know, but I wanted to punt the baby down the aisle like a football....Oh that would of felt much better.. Lastly, the bull dyke with the shaved head and army boots who felt the need to have her cell phone conversations while the bus was dead quiet. She spoke as loud as anyone could possibly speak and I got to hear her point of view on society and how her friends old BF's were "Losers".... OVERALL by the end of the trip down, I paid the extra 160.00 to take a plane back up because there was no way in hell I would get on that bus again....I honestly would have shot myself if I had the chance.. Let Me add: Beef Jerky Boy (who smelled like rotten jerky) Dreadlocks Man (Fat White dood with dreads, kind like Droz from PCU) Tweaker Girls (Girls who are damn annoying and publicly discuss how their moms are crackheads) FF * Registered users of the site do not see these ads. Last edited by Remy E. LeBeau; 04-17-2003 at 03:02 PM.

04-17-2003, 02:55 PM	#4
izhazissuez Scooby Newbie Member#: 33374 Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: buffalo/ Rockland County NY Vehicle: 02 WRX Wagon wrb	i feel your pain I am in buffalo, and my fire dept was having a ski trip in Killington, Vt. I decided that the greyhound was the easier way to get there. About 4 hours into the trip captain greyhound, guy we thought he knew everything was talking, and captain pissed off, big dude that was yelling at someone on his cell phone. Well at this same time, the bus decides to break down on the side of I-90, 2 hours outside of Albany. THat sucked becuase it was about 30 degrees and snowing at the time, and of course we had no heat. From what I say greyhound is the end all be all devil! alf

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04-17-2003, 02:52 PM	#2
HekWRX Scooby Newbie Member#: 11946 Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: OT Day Crew Exile	dood, i could never get on a bus with a bunch of strangers with my luck i would the fat farting person next to me. the non-bather infront of me and ton of screaming little trolls......SHUDDER SHUDDER

04-17-2003, 02:52 PM	#3
Kaiser Scooby Specialist Member#: 7170 Join Date: Jun 2001 Chapter/Region: NESIC Vehicle: Aut Kaiser, aut nullus.	Greyhound by Harry Chapin It's midnight at the depot And I drag my bags in line. Travellin' light, I got to go But the bus won't be on time. Everybody's looking half alive. Later on the bus arrives. They punch my ticket I find a seat And we move out past the lights. Come on Driver, where's the heat? It's cold out in the night. I keep telling to myself that I don't care. Come tomorrow, I'll be there. Take the Greyhound. It's a dog of a way to get around. Take the Greyhound. It's a dog gone easy way to get you down. Tired of watching this night go by So I look across the aisle. The window's frosted, I can't sleep But the girl returns my smile. She reminds me of someone I knew back home. So I doze. So it goes. I'm wrinkled on my stool at the rest stop. The waitress being cozy with the highway cop. My coffee's tasting tired. My eyes roll over dead. Got to go outside and get the gas out of my head. Oh, to be in bed. You got me driving. I'm on your Greyhound bus and you're driving. But there's nothing new about Greyhounds. Nothing new about feeling down. Nothing new about putting off Or putting myself on. Looking to tomorrow is the way the loser hides I should have realized by now that all my life's a ride. It's time to find some happy times and make myself some friends I know there ain't no rainbows waiting when this journey ends. Stepping off this dirty bus first time I understood It's got to be the going not the getting there that's good That's a thought for keeping if I could. It's got to be the going not the getting there that's good. --------------------- (funny story behind this song: the Greyhound execs heard Harry made a song about them, got all excited and called his record company to buy the rights and use it in a commercial, etc...without ever having listened to the song. soon as they did, of course, they changed their minds. greyhound = teh suck)

04-17-2003, 02:58 PM	#5
Johnny Knoxville Scooby Newbie Member#: 18508 Join Date: May 2002 Chapter/Region: MWSOC Location: OH-IO	thats a funny story man

04-17-2003, 03:00 PM	#6
Remy E. LeBeau Scooby Specialist Member#: 4714 Join Date: Mar 2001	I mean it was THAT bad....I honestly wanted to punch the driver and take over the bus and run it off a cliff..............the first 2 days of my vacation were ruined cause I went through so much....so much trauma...I didnt leave my hotel room.... FF

04-17-2003, 03:00 PM	#7
TFW Scooby Specialist Member#: 12608 Join Date: Nov 2001 Chapter/Region: NWIC Location: Finn Hill Vehicle: 2011 Ford Escape Charcoal	I had a friend just get off a greyhound bus in the middle of no where. He seriously would have rather walked to a phone in a city he didn't know and figure it out from there instead of spend a minute more on the greyhound. He said that he was about to completely loose it can start going into hysterics. He had: The smelly COUPLE. The Fat guy 3 infants, 2 of which were sick and crying. The 'talker' The 'open mouth breather with rancid breath' The 'chews with their mouth open obese woman who won't stop eating the ENTIRE trip' The couple having a fight in spanish in the back. He got off the bus somewhere in nevada I think, and made arrangements to get to an airport and fly the rest of the way. After hearing that, i'll do my best to never set foot on a greyhound bus. -T

04-17-2003, 03:01 PM	#8
beethoven Scooby Newbie Member#: 6654 Join Date: May 2001 Chapter/Region: MWSOC Location: Wis-Con-sin Vehicle: 2006 Odyssey 2006 Prius	If you want a nice travelling experience, try Amtrak. It's not as fast as flying, but the views are better, the seats are bigger, and the food is tastier.

04-17-2003, 03:03 PM	#9
HekWRX Scooby Newbie Member#: 11946 Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: OT Day Crew Exile	its cheap for a reason! holy crap this thread solidifies my perception. thank you for letting me learn from your mistakes.

04-17-2003, 03:04 PM	#10
Remy E. LeBeau Scooby Specialist Member#: 4714 Join Date: Mar 2001	Seriously dont do it! I consider myself extremely peaceful but I was on the verge of killing people... FF

04-17-2003, 03:05 PM	#11
GooseMan Scooby Specialist Member#: 2462 Join Date: Sep 2000 Chapter/Region: SCIC Location: Los Angeles/Montreal Vehicle: 2012 Volvo S60 T5 2005 Triumph Sprint ST	I dunno...last year I took a Greyhound down to NYC.....wasnt so bad. There was a hot chick sitting behind me, and some dude from London, so we all talked about cool UK cars (scoobies) and stuff for the duration of the ride. Plus I got the chicks number The way home wasnt so bad cause the bus was empty half way...I was stuck sitting next to some punkass rapper kid, but I gave him a look of death, and he moved seats.

04-17-2003, 03:05 PM	#12
Sirkbac Rest in Peace We love you. Member#: 11971 Join Date: Nov 2001 Chapter/Region: NESIC Location: MA Vehicle: 02 Mazda Protege5 05 Honda CBR1000rr Repsol	My uncle did the greyhound bus thing one time. A fight broke out at the change over and shots were fired, one hitting the wall inches over his shoulder.

04-17-2003, 03:11 PM	#15
GooseMan Scooby Specialist Member#: 2462 Join Date: Sep 2000 Chapter/Region: SCIC Location: Los Angeles/Montreal Vehicle: 2012 Volvo S60 T5 2005 Triumph Sprint ST	hot chicks dont have money. ever notice that? the HOTTEST girls always drive the crappiest cars....

04-17-2003, 03:13 PM	#16
Brad Pittiful Scooby Specialist Member#: 34931 Join Date: Apr 2003 Chapter/Region: Tri-State Location: A Town Called Malice Vehicle: . is his name ∂³∑x²	Frankie, next time ride with Harry Chapin atleast he didnt have any annoying smelly fat loud dyky peeps with him on his ride...btw how was the toilet on the bus?

04-17-2003, 03:15 PM	#17
HekWRX Scooby Newbie Member#: 11946 Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: OT Day Crew Exile	i guess i am to accustom to seeing hot university chicks in nice cars. Baylor=capital of daddy's little gir. I knew girls who flew to houston, dallas and austin every weekend or every other weekend. l