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Old 10-03-2000, 07:40 PM   #1
scooby5
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Wink An Apology from Subaru! (funny)

My GF was flipping one of her old ('98) "Better Homes and Gardens Australia" magazine tonight and showed me the Subaru Ad on the front back cover, I thought it was pretty hilarious. Here goes:

An Apology

Dear Motorists,

Subaru Australia would like to apologise for the article titled 'The Handling Debate' published in a recent issue of AUTOCAR (UK). The contest unfairly pitted the two-wheel drive Porsche 911, BMW M3, Lotus Elise and Peugeot 306 GTi-6 against the All-Wheel Drive Subaru Impreza WRX.

It was not so much the result that has embarrassed us, but the way in which one of the most respected and authoritative motor magazines went about damaging the reputation of the world's most prestigious car companies.

It must have been heartbreaking for them to read that Autocar named the All-Wheel Drive Subaru 'The Ultimate Driver's Car' and called it 'one of the outstanding car designs of the decade.'

Obviously Autocar were amazed by the acceleration off the line of the Subaru during the Traction Test. But did they really have to go on and on about it? 'Six and a half thousand revs, dump the clutch and away she goes. And there was nothing even the 911 could do to touch it.'

Our hearts go out to all those rear-wheel drive Porsche owners who paid 5 times the price of the Subaru, only to come a distant second. As if they didn't have enough insecurities already!

And it's hard not to feel for the poor BMW driver whose M3 clocked up an impressive 46/52mph in the Speed Corner Test, only to read '... that was nothing compared with the beautifully balanced Impreza through the bend. Result? A crushing 52mph in the wet, 58mph in the dry and the widest smile from our drivers all day.' Really, how could a two-wheel drive be expected to compete with that?

But it wasn't until Autocar said '... so well balanced was the Subaru's basic handling and so well apportioned was the grip between the four driven wheels that... in the dry the Subaru was untouchable,' that the rumours and innuendo began to surface.

For the record, we would like to state that every new Impreza, Forester, Outback and Liberty we sell does in fact contain the unfair advantage of Subaru All-Wheel Drive plus our unique flat-four boxer engine and summetrical drive line. Admittedly, it does make contests like this a little one-sided.

So much so that All-Wheel drive vehicles have been banned from the world's major motor sport competitions like Formula One. Only the World Rally Championship allows us to demonstrate the full advantages of AWD. A championship, by the way, we've won for the past 3 years.

Even Autocar admits 'a properly sorted All-Wheel drive car like the Impreza will blitz any two-wheel drive rival in virtually any objective handling contest. That's a truly astonishing result given the quality of the rest of the field.' You see, there was nothing they could do.

In the end, the only thing we couldn't handle was all the attention. 'There was one very clear winner in this contet. The Impreza was more composed, generally faster and markedly grippier than most of the competition in most of the tests.'

Again, Subaru would like to apologise for any harm or distress this has caused any makers or owners of two-wheel-drive vehicles and outrageously expensive sports cars.

The fact that our All-Wheel Drive vehicles start from $21,990 (and $39,990 for the Impreza WRX) must simply rub salt into the wound.

For those looking for compensation, please visit your nearst Subaru Dealer. By experiencing All-Wheel Drive yourself, it should go some way to making the whole situation easier to handle.

If you would like a full copy of the Autocar article in question, call Subaru on 1 800 642 454, or visit our website www.subaru.com.au. And remember, we don't write the articles, we just make the cars.

Yours sincerly,

Trevor Amery
Managing Director
Subaru Australia
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Old 10-03-2000, 07:52 PM   #2
Snoopy
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Oh my God! CLASSIC! BWAHAHA! Oh man....that thing was DRIPPING with sarcasm! Anyone have a "sarcasm" meter?

But yeah, I totally agree. BMW should retract their "fastest saloon in the world" ad for their ///M5.
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Old 10-03-2000, 08:02 PM   #3
Fitz
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Damn fine article...someone was definitley on their toes that day..

Fitz
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Old 10-03-2000, 08:06 PM   #4
Fish
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heh, that's awesome..

kinda saying.. "we are that good.. and know it"

hahah
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Old 10-03-2000, 09:07 PM   #5
Faraz
What?...
Do they speak English in What?

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Talking

I knew it ....so y not the world start learning it too!
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Old 10-03-2000, 09:10 PM   #6
Yeoman
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Talking

I've looked on my hard drive, but can't find it. There's also a rebuttle letter from Porsche. Someone here should have it. It's funny stuff.
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Old 10-03-2000, 09:35 PM   #7
Thug
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Just goes to show that with the right words you can make a saltine seem more appealing than a cherry pie. If you take an Impreza over any of the aforementioned cars, you are clearly an idiot.
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Old 10-03-2000, 09:35 PM   #8
rsquire
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Post

Damn..

Them Aussie magazines tell the truth..

Even if it is OLD news.. That was first published in the Sydney Morning Herald

But then when ya

come from a land down under..

Ya know how to chunder

Richard
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Old 10-03-2000, 09:50 PM   #9
Rich L
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Question

What does "saloon" mean?
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Old 10-03-2000, 10:06 PM   #10
izzy
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saloon means sedan.
( and it's not coop, it's coup-pay )

oh and here's a link to the porsche reposte to the handling debate http://www.crosswinds.net/~davidso/i...ru/porsche.gif
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Old 10-03-2000, 10:48 PM   #11
NeedaScooby
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I said it before, and I'll say it again.

Isn't it funny that Subaru goes and bashes(ok, maybe to harsh a word here) one of these "inferior" car companies and then request's their help on one of their OWN cars?!?!?!

For those who don't know what I'm talking about, Subaru asked Porsche for help on the handling for the B4 RSK. HMMMMMMMMMMMM
Very Interesting.
Anyway, y2k4door, I'm with you. I'll take a 911 or an M3 over a scooby that we can get here anyday, and probably over the pond too. But I cant really say that till I'm there I guess.

P.S. Izzy, crosswinds says it doesnt allow you to link us to their server to veiw the rebutle

[This message has been edited by NeedaScooby (edited October 03, 2000).]
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Old 10-03-2000, 10:59 PM   #12
izzy
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hmm Crosswinds doesn't allow the linking from external sites. but if you open a new browser window and enter the url it should work. http://www.crosswinds.net/~davidso/i...ru/porsche.gif
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Old 10-03-2000, 11:11 PM   #13
NeedaScooby
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D'ohhhhhh, should of thought of that one
Thanks Izzy--


[This message has been edited by NeedaScooby (edited October 03, 2000).]
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Old 10-03-2000, 11:53 PM   #14
Kostamojen
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Question

They didnt test it vs. the 2001 911 Turbo? Oh well
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Old 10-04-2000, 06:30 AM   #15
boxerman
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Does anyone have the original Autocar article? That would be an interesting read.

Tim
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Old 10-04-2000, 06:53 AM   #16
Gambit
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It's old news. But it's still good. I have the original scanned copy of it. If you go to Subaru of New Zealand I think they have the autocar article. Funny thing was that they used a WRX wagon!
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Old 10-04-2000, 06:56 AM   #17
Gambit
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THe Porsche rebuttal was funny. But how come they didn't provide facts that their 911 is superior?
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Old 10-04-2000, 04:52 PM   #18
Andy_T
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How come BMW should retract their "fastest sedan in the world" statement?

The ad didn't even talk about the M5 - only the M3, which is an even older design than the Impreza (I'm talking about chassis here).

Or is this another pop at BMW for no reason?

Andy T
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Old 10-04-2000, 05:47 PM   #19
Jonathan Kent
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Well, y2k4door, you're right. Anyone who would choose the Impreza over the other cars is an idiot.

Personally, I'd take the 911. Then I'd sell it and buy *two* WRX's and more.


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Old 10-04-2000, 08:07 PM   #20
Gambit
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Actually over at another forum, there was a guy from Australia who traded in his 97 911 and bought a red WRX wagon...all after he sat on his friend's WRX!
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