This morning, I'm in the shower, getting mah body all clean. Wife comes in (not into the shower, into the bathroom) and asks says "My mind is completely blown. Guess what happened?"

My mind immediately started spinning out of control:

1. She found the 50 GB of fetish porn I stashed on her work PC. (Best place to hide something is somewhere they'll never look)
2. Some crazy bird from my past called her and said that I was the one. But the kid is not my son. *crotch grab*
3. She found my Valentine's Day present: Sex chair and a case of astroglide
4. The tests came back and she's pregnant. I'm snipped, she's on the pill.

So to control the damage I replied "No idea".

She then tells me that she had received an email through FB from some woman asking her to provide a character reference and general feedback on her father as a potential suitor. Said they'd been talking for a while online, but had never met. She said he'd disclosed info about my wife and our family and that was how she'd found her. Prior to meeting him, she wanted to ensure that he was a stand-up guy and not some slimeball/douche/psycho.


My wife deleted the email.


Quick Background: Wife's parents who were married for 35 years separated last year, divorced a few months back. Both were a little crazy (IMO) pre-divorce, but since divorce it's like they've regressed and gone bat-**** crazy. They're both acting like teenagers (both are north 50's) who finally got the pass to do what they want. Mom is dating some guy who is wealthy and eerily resembles Dad (now-ex-hubby).
Dad has been out with who knows how many women.

We politely told them a few months back that their personal lives need to be exactly that; don't place our family in the middle. We don't need to meet or know about these people they're dating unless they want to re-marry. Don't discuss them with our kids as trying to explain exactly what has happened needs to wait a few more years.


I told her she should remove her dad from her FB account, inform him that this happened, and tell him that this was unacceptable. I also said this was yet another check in the column under "Why FB is a double edged sword and Hotelpro would sooner give fellatio to John Holmes than join".


So this goes to show, crazy doesn't fade with age. If you sense the crazy early, either run or get counseling. Or your kids could get an email from some stranger about you and whether they'd give you the green-light as someone to date.



CN: Wife's parents divorced after 35 years. The crazy has surfaced, unusual circumstance happened.


ibcoolstorybrobrahetc
ibokterrific
ibandthen

Pics of anything but your father-in-law.

Yep, that's nipple. Just for you JB.

Pics of Hotwife!

IBabumpinthreeyears

I hope I don't have an update that starts out
"So, you know the movie Four Christmases..."

This is why I won't accept my parents' or sisters' friend requests or family info update thingy on FB. I don't want them knowing what I'm doing and I don't want to get dragged into crap like this.

What, you would?
Fine, ATM.

Its spelled "fellatio."

this thread is very unamusing

being on FB I must find your wife and send your itemized list to her.

Both work via teh interwebs, but merriam-webster says you are correct.
And we know MW is the source on that sort of thing.

I figured it might elicit a or .


Par for the course.

Tell her to be a good character reference.

Get your father-in-law some play.

I have a LOT of relatives including my grandmother as friends and I cringe now and then at the thought but my family loves seeing what I am up to. I just wish someof my really young cousins weren't on my page.

Yeah ... the OP is the anti-Wingman.

Alternate title "Goggle me bitch"