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Old 03-27-2013, 07:37 PM   #176
Beau M
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I had a neighbor with a very loud dog. I left a note the first time, and a few times after that because they were never home and left the dog outside to bark and roam the neigborhood.

Some of the neighbors said it didn't bother them, others said it did. The dog was RIGHT NEXT to my house however, and sounded like it was barking in my living room. When caught them at home I politley asked that they do something, I got a lot of hostility and "WTF are you gonna do" type attitude. I mentioned that others in the neighborhood were also upset, they didn't care much.

This is not a fair position to put your neighbors in, and can be very frustrating for them. I own my home, I can't just up and move because of a barking dog or loud ass with a fart can.

However, I did know their landlord and gave him a ring. He was pissed because he told them repeatedly they couldnt have a dog. About a week later there was a u-haul in front of their place.

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Old 03-27-2013, 07:45 PM   #177
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If you're neighbors dog is constantly barking, and they don't do anything about it, it's safe to assume they're jerks and you should just call animal control.
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Old 03-27-2013, 08:04 PM   #178
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Honestly this is exactly what is wrong with most people. Too afraid to say anything to this guys face about his car. Not like he is standing in his yard buck naked
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Old 03-27-2013, 08:23 PM   #179
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShadowIMg View Post
No, I was in no way afraid of a couple of annoying college kids. However, it was not passive aggressive, it was a request. I gave them the option to stop without involving authorities, they chose not to.

There is exactly no upside to me 'confronting' them with this. Nor any reason for me to waste my time. I wrote a note that said "stop smoking in the building" and left it on their door. It took me all of 5 seconds. I did not care to have a discussion on it, it wasn't a topic open for debate. It was do this or I'll report it to the authorities.

His exhaust may be legal, but most likely it's not. Very few aftermarket exhausts are. Many neighborhoods also have additional agreements in your neighborhood laws/etc around noise, times, etc. My point is, be damn sure you're on the right side of all applicable laws/regulations. Your neighbors have no obligation to even give you notice.

I'm not sure why you immediately assume this all comes down to fear. It's a least-effort approach, because you shouldn't have to deal with it in the first place.
So you're a snitch over something harmless. Got it.
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Old 03-27-2013, 08:36 PM   #180
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So you're a snitch over something harmless. Got it.

thats the exact kind of attitude that makes people hate pot heads in the first place.

If the building is a smoke free residence, and as mentioned - has a rule about no smoking (and that means anything - not just cigarettes) - taking out the argument of legalization or any of that - the guy has a right to not have to inhale other people's effing fumes - for *whatever* reason they choose not to want to inhale it - regardless of how harmless you consider it.

Since i too have had too many conversations with morons who want to convert me to the green party instead of just smoking up somewhere the hell else - i too would have written them a note rather than hear their rhetorical bull****.
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Old 03-27-2013, 08:41 PM   #181
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thats the exact kind of attitude that makes people hate pot heads in the first place.

If the building is a smoke free residence, and as mentioned - has a rule about no smoking (and that means anything - not just cigarettes) - taking out the argument of legalization or any of that - the guy has a right to not have to inhale other people's effing fumes - for *whatever* reason they choose not to want to inhale it - regardless of how harmless you consider it.

Since i too have had too many conversations with morons who want to convert me to the green party instead of just smoking up somewhere the hell else - i too would have written them a note rather than hear their rhetorical bull****.
Not a pothead...background checks tend to disqualify you from government jobs when you've used. And it's a federal crime to lie during those, considering I have to be able to pass a polygraph, I wouldn't even try to get away with it.
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Old 03-27-2013, 09:47 PM   #182
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Originally Posted by jhmr View Post
Passive aggressive: "Expressing aggression in non-assertive, subtle (that is, passive or indirect) ways."

Aggression: "Readiness to attack or confront."

Writing a note when somebody else bothers you, displays a readiness to confront the individual about the problem in a non-assertive subtle manner. It's a means through which you can tell someone something they don't want to hear (although it may be necessary) while simultaneously robbing them of the ability to tell their side of the story. It's unfair. There's something wrong when two adults cannot have a normal discussion that brings these issues to light in order to figure out a compromise. There doesn't need to be a conflict. In my opinion notes are just as disrespectful as having a loud exhaust. You're making a demand, not trying to meet half-way. That is way meaner than what I propose. Maybe I'm a jerk, but at least I know I am. Continue hiding behind your polite notes and keep telling yourself that you're a "good" person if it makes you feel better.
Nope!

Thanks for playing.

The note was NOT subtle or non-assertive. It was direct and to the point.

There is no "side of the story" to be told. The car was loud and waking people up at pre-dawn hours. He does not have a tale to tell of his car woes. That's it.

Sorry, but you're just wrong.

YOU want a dialogue. Great for you! Good luck with that. Not everything gets to be argued in open court. Sometimes you just have to take the criticism and deal with it, not jump up on your horse and defend your own honor.
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Old 03-27-2013, 10:02 PM   #183
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I'm not shocked that someone from NoVA is acting haughty and passive aggressive. That's the norm in the area.
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Old 03-27-2013, 10:25 PM   #184
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Let it warm up completley, back out in the morning and do a hard launch to redline.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:12 AM   #185
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Originally Posted by Girion47 View Post
So you're a snitch over something harmless. Got it.
Yes, because I have a lease, and in the terms of that lease included that the building is completely non smoking (also non pet). I pay quite a bit of money to live here under this agreement. The other tenants also agreed to this, and apparently had no intention of upholding their contract.

Harmless? I work in a heavily regulated industry (as you seem to), and my girlfriend is a pediatrician in private practice. Many of my friends are also in regulated industries, and her friends are largely medical practitioners. I don't care to take risks with both of our lives.

Let me tell you, there's nothing better than meeting your mother, sister, niece, and 2 nephews at your door through a cloud of pot smoke.

I know pot heads want to think they have no negative impact to those around them, and that's exactly what these guys thought (I spoke with the landlord after it had happened, and he said even after he explained everything, they still didn't understand). Doesn't make it true.

Just like you enjoying your exhaust note and not finding it 'loud' doesn't make it true for everyone else.

Where I was going with this originally was that understand your lines. You have really 3 distinct levels here:

1) Illegal - if they complain, you're likely ****ed, no matter what argument you bring to the table.
2) Annoying, but legal - you're just a dick if you choose to ignore the complaints. It's not illegal to be a dick.
3) Be a considerate neighbor, and address it. Now, I'm going to believe what you believe and say you solved it. Great. Do remember though, if they are like me, and didn't want to talk to you in the first place, when you came to talk to me about it I would've said whatever I thought would make you go away the soonest and end the conversation. This would not be a reflection of my future feelings toward the matter.

Really all I ever want from my neighbors is to never know they exist. I extend the same courtesy to them and try to make myself completely unnoticed.

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Nope!

Thanks for playing.

The note was NOT subtle or non-assertive. It was direct and to the point.

There is no "side of the story" to be told. The car was loud and waking people up at pre-dawn hours. He does not have a tale to tell of his car woes. That's it.

Sorry, but you're just wrong.

YOU want a dialogue. Great for you! Good luck with that. Not everything gets to be argued in open court. Sometimes you just have to take the criticism and deal with it, not jump up on your horse and defend your own honor.
Exactly right. This is not aggressive at all. It is specifically non-aggressive. To confront someone is aggressive. You can be passive in that confrontation, or direct in that confrontation. A note is specifically NON aggressive, unless you word it in a rather specific manner. The entire purpose is to avoid unnecessary or unwanted confrontation.

If the neighbor came up to him and said like "Hey neighbor, that exhaust of yours, kinda has some bass to it hey? Real deep rumble. Could really rattle some windows!"

That would be passive-aggressive.
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Old 03-28-2013, 04:32 AM   #186
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I still think you should get a Blitz nur spec r catback.
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Old 03-28-2013, 07:06 AM   #187
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I found that my neighborhood has a bunch of middle aged car enthusiasts who dont mind noise. They are all very respectfull of the rules put in place in the neighborhood. then there is that one young guy who likes riced out hondas who after being warned a few times eventually fell in line as well sorta.

Needless to say an exhaust note is not something anyone gives a crap about unless you are being a douche and its a private residential area. The only guy to ever get some sort of talking to by the head of the community was the honda guy because he was running a small business modifying cars from his garage which was illegal and people got sick of every fart can equiped rice rocket flying through the neighborhood during test drives rather than being respectful and taking that nonsense elsewhere.

Otherwise like I said nobody cares. Good example is the guy who has his race car in his garage that he works on. So long as you cut the noise out by 9pm everyone is happy and civil about it. They understand people have their hobbies.

But just in case there is that one person that might be sensitive/easily bothered in the morning I am kind enough to crawl out of my driveway without waking the neighbors. The SPT cat back creates enough noise that I am sure someone would notice if I was being inconsiderate. It also helps that I have only one other house between mine and the entrance to the community so the distance is short.
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Old 03-28-2013, 07:09 AM   #188
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So you're a snitch over something harmless. Got it.
Harmless? Waking people at 5:00AM on a consistent basis is not harmless...especially if kids are involved. Sorry, but I don't pay a mortgage and taxes so I can hear some a$$hole kids loud exhaust early every morning.

What I've learned over the years is clueless jerks like these are either too stupid or just don't give a $h!te about anyone but themselves, so confronting them is a big waste of time...and just ends up raising your blood pressure. Reporting them to the proper authorities is usually your best course of action...both legally and for your sanity.
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Old 03-28-2013, 07:33 AM   #189
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ShadowIMg - I'm gonna steal this line, file the serial numbers off and use it:
Quote:
Really all I ever want from my neighbors is to never know they exist. I extend the same courtesy to them and try to make myself completely unnoticed.
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Old 03-28-2013, 09:20 AM   #190
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If you're neighbors dog is constantly barking, and they don't do anything about it, it's safe to assume they're jerks and you should just call animal control.
Not to derail the thread, but the town I live in doesn't have animal control. We contract that out to a private organization who says they only deal with animal welfare. Well, this was a chihuahua that was left outside all day and night through freezing temps, they said they would "look ino it". I called the cops a few times, they said they couldn't do anything.


It sucks to have someone make your living conditions, your HOME, be uncomfortable and not have the power to change it.

I had an idea though if it continued. Fom my back yard there is a good view of their bedroom window. I was going to put my projector on a ladder. every time the dog was left out to bark I would beam the Sarah McLaughlin cruelty commercial onto thier bedroom wall. "In the arms of an angeeeeeeeel".
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Old 03-28-2013, 09:22 AM   #191
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Originally Posted by WRXLTD View Post
Harmless? Waking people at 5:00AM on a consistent basis is not harmless...especially if kids are involved. Sorry, but I don't pay a mortgage and taxes so I can hear some a$$hole kids loud exhaust early every morning.

What I've learned over the years is clueless jerks like these are either too stupid or just don't give a $h!te about anyone but themselves, so confronting them is a big waste of time...and just ends up raising your blood pressure. Reporting them to the proper authorities is usually your best course of action...both legally and for your sanity.
Yup, you're a mass-hole

Last edited by Girion47; 03-28-2013 at 09:31 AM.
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Old 03-28-2013, 09:39 AM   #192
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I called the cops a few times, they said they couldn't do anything.


It sucks to have someone make your living conditions, your HOME, be uncomfortable and not have the power to change it.
Yanno, it's hard to speak in terms of laws like everywhere in the country because they're so different. Somehow, though, I feel like the police were lying to you just to brush you off. If the dog is barking outside all night long, I'm pretty sure they can actually do something.

Have you considered contacting a local rescue group? If you were in Missouri, I could point you to some folks with connections and it would get handled rather speedy. They don't take kindly to animal cruelty.
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Old 03-28-2013, 09:51 AM   #193
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Honestly this is exactly what is wrong with most people. Too afraid to say anything to this guys face about his car. Not like he is standing in his yard buck naked
What is it about a polite note that is inherently wrong, and what about face-to-face is inherently right? The fact that you think it's a matter of "fear" indicates you're looking at this from the wrong perspective. This is not a conflict. There is no "him vs the neighbors." It's a simple request.

On a related note, there's a guy in my neighborhood with a newer WRX with an exhaust. When I first moved into the neighborhood, I pulled a "I hear a Subaru! Where is it???" the first few times her drove by. I can hear this guy start his car 300 yards away, actually. Now, I suspect he thought I was eying him up, thinking he was driving too fast, and I think perhaps he might drive a little extra carefully as a result. Now, I actually wasn't eying him up at all. I just thought it looked/sounded nice and it made me nostalgic for my WRX. But the point is, he was self-aware and made the adult decision to act like he lives in a society with other people around, and made a small adjustment accordingly (even if unnecessarily).
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Old 03-28-2013, 10:31 AM   #194
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Originally Posted by Asinine View Post
What is it about a polite note that is inherently wrong, and what about face-to-face is inherently right? The fact that you think it's a matter of "fear" indicates you're looking at this from the wrong perspective. This is not a conflict. There is no "him vs the neighbors." It's a simple request.
you forget - everyone on the internet thinks they are tough as f*ck, and the e-bravado is super strong when they criticize others for lacking it. Most of these bravetards wouldn't do half they crap they say they would...
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Old 03-28-2013, 10:55 AM   #195
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Maybe it's just the way people are raised. I was raised that if yo had a issue or problem with someone to talk to them face to face. I guess some people were not taught to do that. It has nothing to do with being "tough" or making them fear you. I just think that it's a bit ridiculous that they would write a note when they live next door, especially if they always could tell when he is home due to his loud exhaust.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:54 PM   #196
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I drive my car in neighborhoods in 3rd gear to keep it as quiet as possible. I also rarely drive it at night due to consideration for my neighbors (and since I have 2 other cars to drive) Some idiot a55hole a street over has a 05' with a loud exhaust & drives like a moron staying in 2nd gear & going 30mph speeding along.

I had one neighbor tell me they woke up to my loud car the other night. Funny thing is, my car has been parked in my driveway for a month with the battery unplugged. I told her it is some jerk-off on the other street and she was like "oh sorry".

Gotta love inconsiderate pr!cks giving me & all of you a bad name.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:59 PM   #197
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This thread should have been closed long ago. It's just people ranting or getting on the op. Im sure the op gets the point that no one agrees with him!
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Old 03-28-2013, 02:14 PM   #198
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Gotta love inconsiderate pr!cks giving me & all of you a bad name.
... you've managed to encapsulate the majority of Nasioc in a single sentence, high five.
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Old 03-29-2013, 07:40 AM   #199
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Yup, you're a mass-hole
If your definition of "Mass-Hole" is the type of person you don't **** with, then you're spot on.

Sounds like you and the OP are the same creed...inconsiderate a$$ho!es.
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Old 03-29-2013, 08:04 AM   #200
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I agree there is nothing passive aggressive about the note and that it doesn't mean the person who left it is a pu$$y. It depends on the circumstances. If I knew the neighbor at least somewhat on a personal level, then I'd talk to them about it in person. If I didn't know them at all or thought there is a chance they'd react confrontational and possibly retaliate with damage to my car or property, then I'd probably leave the note.

For those that insist that you must have the face to face conversation rather than a note, what would you do if the person responds either like a dick, doesn't care at all or even worse, retaliates in some way?
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