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Old 11-07-2017, 12:33 PM   #5826
chapstien
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Well, it looks like I have a girlfriend now, the one that lives 2 hours away. I suppose that's the term to use when you are dating exclusively. We get along incredibly well. So far no sexors, just kissing. We both like the friends first idea, but I think it might not take us as long to get to be friends as I had in my mind. It is a lot easier to keep that out of the equation when seeing someone doesn't involve an overnight stay.

She rides bikes, (does centuries which is a 100 mile ride,) runs, hikes, backpacks, likes bikepacking, want to learn to ski, is fit and looks absolutely great for a 51-year old.
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Old 11-07-2017, 12:39 PM   #5827
wteGDF
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2 hours away...I hope you enjoy driving.

I fired tinder up about a week ago. I already see why I did not miss the dating world. Whats the point of giving me your phone number to basically stop responding after 2 days.
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Old 11-07-2017, 12:42 PM   #5828
chapstien
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Her son lives in the town next to me, and she visits about once a month. I'll probably drive down there once a month too, and Mt. Shasta is 1/2 way between us.

I've had the same Tinder experience. One quit I think because it took me 12+ hours to reply to a message about meeting for a hike sometime. Bumble too.
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Old 11-07-2017, 12:49 PM   #5829
VpointVick
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Been chatting with a woman much younger than I am, 95% OKC match with an ass of questions answered so good indicator (unlike those 85% matches who have only answered a dozen softball questions). She's more comfortable getting to know someone via chat for a while before meeting so we've been doing that, I think that she was ready to meet about a week ago but had gotten sick so we've been continuing. Starting to feel like we know each other about as well as two people who haven't met can know each other, and we both really seem to be into each other. We swapped phone numbers Saturday morning and moved off the app and have ~500 messages between us since.

Finally going to take her out Friday night (she figures that she'll feel better well before that but wants it to be Friday so that I "can keep her out late" )

I've been really surprised at how much we've got in common to talk about given that she could be my daughter, and the things where the age gap is evident, like a Nickelodeon show that she had watched as a kid that I had never heard of, have been opportunities for fun and laughter between us.

Trying not to build it up too much but I'm starting to think that maybe I got over the other chick in the nick of time.
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Old 11-07-2017, 01:16 PM   #5830
UKscooby
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What is your age gap?

I'm good friends with a 30 year old (I'm 40) which shows a lot of signs of turning in to a relationship.
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Old 11-07-2017, 01:18 PM   #5831
chapstien
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When I met this woman, it was instantly familiar because of writing and talking.
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Old 11-07-2017, 01:56 PM   #5832
VpointVick
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UKscooby View Post
What is your age gap?

I'm good friends with a 30 year old (I'm 40) which shows a lot of signs of turning in to a relationship.
16 years. I'm 49, she's 33.
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Old 11-07-2017, 02:54 PM   #5833
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wteGDF View Post
2 hours away...I hope you enjoy driving.

I fired tinder up about a week ago. I already see why I did not miss the dating world. Whats the point of giving me your phone number to basically stop responding after 2 days.
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Old 11-17-2017, 03:45 PM   #5834
UKscooby
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Its been 2 years, to the day in fact, that I was with the crazy that messed me up so much. Glad to be out of that and fully recovered with a much more stable woman by my side, and in a much better place as a person.

So, that said, I still have a car loan with ex crazy. Car is in my possession, titled in my name, I pay the payments but her name is on the loan too. I have refused to take it off as it means refinancing which affects my credit for buying a house. She has bugged me to get her name off and wants the loan paid off by end of year which is 2 months early.

Do I be a dick and keep paying until pay off in Feb or just get it out of the way and pay it off early, reducing my credit score for a few months? I've had my credit ran again for a mortgage so I have a 120 day window to secure a house before they need to run it again. He r reason for me paying it off early is to buy a house herself. Not sure why I should make her life and the guy she cheated on me with lives any easier.
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Old 11-17-2017, 03:50 PM   #5835
mhoward1
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The other option could be keeping her name on the loan and giving her the rights of 50% of the sell proceeds.
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Old 11-17-2017, 03:54 PM   #5836
UKscooby
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Hell no. She hasn't made a single payment on the car. Equity currently is around $7K. Not a chance I'm giving her a free $3500 payout.
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Old 11-17-2017, 03:55 PM   #5837
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She cheated on you? Screw her.
Buy your house, secure your ****, and pay off car as normal.

I was thinking last night about how me and the ex had a shared account, which I put in most if not all of the money, but she took half on divorce.
Sure stings to lose about 20k on that + what I lost selling my condo, but thats the price of freedom












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Old 11-17-2017, 04:10 PM   #5838
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vapore0n View Post
I was thinking last night about how me and the ex had a shared account, which I put in most if not all of the money, but she took half on divorce.
Sure stings to lose about 20k on that + what I lost selling my condo, but thats the price of freedom
Yeah, this is part of my worry is that while the future ex is playing nice now that a lawyer puts into her head that she should go after more. Hoping to get through the process quickly so I keep as much as I can.

But yeah, guess I'll be posting in this thread soon.







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Old 11-17-2017, 04:18 PM   #5839
vapore0n
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sorbee711 View Post
Yeah, this is part of my worry is that while the future ex is playing nice now that a lawyer puts into her head that she should go after more. Hoping to get through the process quickly so I keep as much as I can.

But yeah, guess I'll be posting in this thread soon.







I was lucky. We agreed to just split that account in half, and thats it.
Well, we were married for less than a year. She wouldnt get much of anything else.
All done in record time. Went to the judge with all papers filled up, next day we went again due to not making it on time, and done. Though it takes 90 days to be effective after that.

On that note. If she was or is on your medical plan, or you are on hers, verify that you(or her) is covered under CORBA for the time it takes the divorce to be final (90 days after letter from judge arrives).
I got screwed by her insurance because they made it count from the day we went to the judge, not the day it was official. My insurance wouldnt cover me till the official date, and thus I had to pay due to not being insured.
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Old 11-17-2017, 04:21 PM   #5840
mhoward1
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UKscooby View Post
Hell no. She hasn't made a single payment on the car. Equity currently is around $7K. Not a chance I'm giving her a free $3500 payout.
Unfortunately as long as her name is on the title and on the loan it doesn’t matter if she’s made any payments or not. If I were you I would get her name off of everything I could as long as she asked for that on everything. Once that is done, then you have no more worries about it.
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Old 11-17-2017, 04:49 PM   #5841
UKscooby
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No, she was dumb. She owns half a loan, not half a car. The title is in mine and the banks name only.
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Old 11-17-2017, 07:17 PM   #5842
mhoward1
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UKscooby View Post
No, she was dumb. She owns half a loan, not half a car. The title is in mine and the banks name only.
So she was a co-signer?
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Old 11-17-2017, 09:04 PM   #5843
UKscooby
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Correct.
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Old 11-17-2017, 09:24 PM   #5844
chapstien
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You're on the title, and the registration I suppose. You have record of payments. I don't see how she has a claim to the car at all.

Edit - I see you covered that.

How much would paying it off 2 months early affect your credit?

Tell her that if the gives you the money for Jan and Feb, you'll pay it off.
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Old 11-25-2017, 01:15 AM   #5845
VpointVick
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VpointVick View Post
Been chatting with a woman much younger than I am, 95% OKC match with an ass of questions answered so good indicator (unlike those 85% matches who have only answered a dozen softball questions). She's more comfortable getting to know someone via chat for a while before meeting so we've been doing that, I think that she was ready to meet about a week ago but had gotten sick so we've been continuing. Starting to feel like we know each other about as well as two people who haven't met can know each other, and we both really seem to be into each other. We swapped phone numbers Saturday morning and moved off the app and have ~500 messages between us since.

Finally going to take her out Friday night (she figures that she'll feel better well before that but wants it to be Friday so that I "can keep her out late" )

I've been really surprised at how much we've got in common to talk about given that she could be my daughter, and the things where the age gap is evident, like a Nickelodeon show that she had watched as a kid that I had never heard of, have been opportunities for fun and laughter between us.

Trying not to build it up too much but I'm starting to think that maybe I got over the other chick in the nick of time.
First date - fancy restaurant and then closed down a brewery, unfortunately she ended up coming down with the freaking flu right after this so it was more than a week before...

Second date - I cooked at my house

Just got back from third date - went to a movie then ate dinner and hung out at her house

Gotten some great hugs and made out pretty good, but neither of us are pushing to do the deed. Plenty of sexual tension but it seems like both of us are seeing a lot of potential for something more and are looking to let things develop as they will without getting a bunch of oxytocin in the way of us being able keep our judgement clear.

She's ****ing awesome. We can be laughing at one another and go straight to some deep convo and right back to laughing again and feel completely at ease the whole time.
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Old 11-25-2017, 02:34 PM   #5846
torquemada
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does "three dates no sex welcome to the friend zone" still apply in these days
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Old 11-25-2017, 02:37 PM   #5847
VpointVick
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Quote:
Originally Posted by torquemada View Post
does "three dates no sex welcome to the friend zone" still apply in these days
Not when there's communication. We're definitely more than friends.
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Old 11-25-2017, 02:42 PM   #5848
torquemada
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VpointVick View Post
Not when there's communication. We're definitely more than friends.


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Old 11-26-2017, 05:32 PM   #5849
VpointVick
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Quote:
Originally Posted by torquemada View Post
does "three dates no sex welcome to the friend zone" still apply in these days
Son of a...

You put her up to this, didn't you *******?

I am dumped.
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Old 11-26-2017, 06:03 PM   #5850
GodWhomIsMike
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I quit one of my jobs to free up two nights a week to get back into the dating game. I was teaching four nights a week after work, which kept me burned out and had no time to do anything. Two weeks left on that teaching gig. Looking forward to having a social life again and meeting people.

I will miss the money, which got me nice stuff over the last few years like a new shed, lawn tractor, tractor mounted snowblower, helped a lot with the cost of new windows and sliding doors on my house, and a new front door.
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